


One Last Golden Chance

by 42gabi24



Series: One Last Golden Chance [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Anger Management, Anxiety, Brotherly Affection, Brotherly Love, Car Accidents, Cultural Differences, F/M, Fame, Family Feels, Gay Male Character, Idols, Immigration & Emigration, K-pop References, M/M, Magical Accidents, Magical Realism, Musical References, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Objectification, Original Mythology, Platonic Soulmates, Poverty, Supernatural Elements, Supernatural Illnesses, Symbolism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-09-28 21:01:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 30,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17190320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/42gabi24/pseuds/42gabi24
Summary: Yujin, Seongyeol, Sehwan, and Jeong thought that their brief career as K-pop Idols was over after their disastrous first debut, but the international superstar Kim 'Patrick' Daein takes an unusual interest in their inexperienced group.In other words:Yujin only saw black feathers, Jeong was slowly falling in love, Sehwan was trying to find something that would make him happy, Seongyeol was fighting for himself and Daein tried to find a place to fit in.The rating will change to Explicit as the story progresses and more tags will be added, some were removed due to the time it would take for them to appear.





	1. Rain and Thunder

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is 42gabi24, or Gabi if it tickles your pickle. This work is the first I consider good enough to post here, it' my baby for two entire months (a miracle for me). 
> 
> Criticism is encouraged, please remember to be civil, even if it hurts my feelings either way ;)
> 
> If you want to read my previous drafts of the stories you can find me at @Here4thefanfiction under the same name, and two extras from my previous story, Vis Major (discontinued). 
> 
> I tried my best to reflect Korean culture in the way the characters act, however I'm not Korean myself, so please feel free to correct me or leave tips on the way certain characters interact with each other.
> 
> Please enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually realized this that at this current chapter the majority of the tags I put in the tin have no relevance to the story (at this moment! Please be patient ! ^_^) so I apologize to everyone who expected crazy fantasy adventures right away. But for those still interested, if you keep an eye open you's see some weird stuff happening. Enjoy!

The black car made its way down the busy street, inside it, Yujin looked dazedly at the blurry shapes that passed by his window. He closed his eyes to watch the play of sunshine and shadow behind his eyelids, he listened to the music blaring in his ears.

Yujin kept replaying 'Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?'s chorus over and over, not caring about the rest of the song. The rhythm of the drums accompanied by the guitar calmed down his buzzing nerves. He knew they'd be back as soon as he arrived at his aunt's apartment. He wasn't looking forward to Monday. Or Sunday. Or today.

His left earbud popped out of his ear, he pushed it back in. Tired of the same passage repeated over and over again, Yujin changed the song. He deemed 'Daydream' a good enough choice for background noise.

He focused on the blurry streets beyond his window. Seoul wasn't any different from any other big city he's been to, yet he found himself intimidated by the rising skyscrapers that glinted in the sunlight. It all felt the same as in Incheon and yet completely different. It felt bigger, not in size but in something else, like a true capital. It was also the first time he'd been away from home and from his mother. They saw each other a couple of hours ago, and while he may have spent longer periods of time away from her, the knowledge that at the end of the day he wouldn't be back to her made him tear up one more time.

He focused again on the sound coming from his earbuds, it was a different song now, he couldn't tell the name, nor its author. It sounded familiar because he had replayed the melody again and again the moment he found the lazy tune on the internet. It was at the bottom of his playlist at the moment, he'd lost interest pretty soon.

Another thought that occupied his mind was where were they going to leave. He didn't know much about Aunt Jiyoo, his mother's estranged sister. She had been sparse during his early childhood, only appearing on the occasional birthday and then disappearing altogether. The only memento he had of her was the lovingly placed family photo of her and his mother as teenagers and a breathtaking painting of a field bluebonnets. He still remembered the color vividly, unfortunately the piece of art had to be left behind in his old room.

 

 

 

 

The thought was like a punch in the gut, Yujin's eyes burned with unshed tears and he rubbed at his face with the sleeve of his hoodie to get rid of the prickling sensation. The rough fabric hurt the thin skin of his face, but Yoongi's seen him cry twice already and it was embarrassing the first time, never mind the second. He sniffed once but his bodyguard didn't appear to notice and continued to tap at the steering wheel to some song on the radio.

They got to their destination shortly after. Yujin meekly followed Yoongi to his aunt's door after watching the man heave the four duffel bags that contained all his clothes and necessities. Yoongi rang on his aunt's doorbell, arms heavy with the luggage he was carrying. Yujin stared at his back, anxious about his aunt's reaction to having to take them in. Would she welcome them with open arms? Did she want him here at all? Probably not, Yujin was nothing but trouble and his bodyguard would have mentioned her welcoming disposition if it were the case. He waited.

He heard a muffled 'Coming!', followed by several dull thuds and something falling on the floor. Footsteps neared the door.  It swung open and his harried-looking aunt Jiyoo stared at them as if they had knocked on her window to enter. Her eyes went from Yoongi's amused smile, to the heavy bags he was carrying, to Yujin himself.

-No.- She almost slammed the door in Yoongi's face, but his arm shot out quickly to stop the heavy wooden door from closing with a loud smack of skin against wood. The four different bags he was carrying jostled from the sharp movement. She grimaced in outrage. Yoongi's grin sharpened.

-Jiyoo-ssi, you and Seoyeon-noona talked about this.- Yoongi sounded tired despite the joyful expression on his handsome face.

-Yes, we did, and I said no.- She pushed the door, probably putting all of her weight behind the action, but it didn't budge from Yoongi's iron grip.

-No, she called you and you hung up on her and then ignored all of her messages.

-Yes, maybe.- Her gaze landed on him, with a scowl at him she turned back to Yoongi, an annoyed glare twisting her angelic face.- I'm not a babysitter Yoongi-ssi, you better leave my house right now. I don't have time for kids. Especially this one.

Yujin's cheeks reddened as he looked at his blue sneakers, he focused on the pretty color trying to ignore the rest of their conversation. His left earbud slipped from his ear. Annoyed at the inconvenience, he ripped the other earbud and crammed the long white cable in the pocket of his jacket.

-Watch it, noona.- Something in Yoongi's voice tightened warningly, but he didn't snap because Yoongi was cool like that, he never got angry.- And you're not his babysitter, I am. Let the kid spend the night in a bed for fuck's sake.

-Okay, jeez,- She huffed. She stared at both of them for a few long seconds. With furrowed eyebrows, she said,- Fine, you're staying for tonight but you better find somewhere else to stay by tomorrow.

-Yeah, sure.- Yoongi put a warm hand on the back of his head, smiling down at him like he'd won the lottery. Yujin tried to smile back just for him. He knew it didn't come out quite right.

They stepped inside and Yujin instantly liked the place, it was bright with a lot of plants and wooden furniture that gave it an organic feeling. He hesitantly walked towards the living-room. At the corner of the spacious area was a blank canvas surrounded by white plastic sheets on the floor and walls. He curiously stared at the dirty cans filled to the brim with different colors of paint. It looked messy and disorganized but it really couldn't matter if the bluebonnets were painted like that.

-Where can I put the bags?- Asked Yoongi.- I need a room where he can sleep.

Yujin looked up in alarm.

-Are you leaving, Yoongi-hyung?- He didn't want to be alone, not with aunt Jiyoo that apparently hated him.

\- No, Yujin-ah, I need to put your stuff down, my arms are going to fall off.- Yoongi reached to pat at his head with a grunt.- Let me worry about the rest, I promised your mom didn't I?- Jiyoo-ssi!

-Yah, okay mamma bear, follow me, I have room for him.- Called Jiyoo as she hurriedly picked up stray papers from the tables and other furniture. Yujin hated that she talked about him as if he wasn't there. He didn't remember her being like that when he was younger.

They could see as she gave them an involuntary tour of the apartment that the house was very big, each room was like three of the once in his house. There were bathrooms and several bedrooms all connected by a long hallway. Occasionally he could see big empty rooms for storage, some had shelves upon shelves filled with cans and small carton boxes, other had canvas of all different sizes propped against the wall. One of them had a disorganized desk, and another had more canvas covered with white sheets. Funnily enough, if he looked at the floor tiles and the walls he could see little specks of paint or faded footprints.

She led them to one of the rooms at the end of the corridor, it seemed emptier than any of the others he saw. Their beds had differently colored sheets and covers and some had bookcases filled to the brim. This one had one double bed and one wardrobe. (The wardrobe looked ugly in his opinion.)

-Perfect.- Said Yoongi. With a small bow, he added,- Thank you, noona.

-I can pull out the couch later, I didn't expect guests.- She threw a pointed look at Yoongi's back who was already putting down the heavy duffel bags he had been carrying the whole time. Yujin scowled at her because Yoongi was the best and didn't deserve her mean attitude. He stopped quickly before she saw him though.- And I'm not your noona, freeloader.

-No, this is fine we'll share.- Yoongi said as he stretched his back and rotated his shoulders with several quiet pops. She bristled at his disrespect in ignoring her reprimand.

Then her expression shifted to surprise, sending Yujin a look that he didn't know how to respond to. He blinked at her once and then lowered his eyes to the floor just beside her slippers, they were pink with little bunnies on them.

-Okay, then,- She shrugged and exited the room. Yujin watched the small bunnies leave tersely with a huff. He didn't talk to her once.

He was pretty sure she didn't mean to slam the door behind her that hard, but the loud noise made him jump in fright. His bodyguard clicked his tongue in dissaproval.

-Yujin-ah,- Called quietly Yoongi.- Come help me put your clothes away.

-Okay hyung,- He agreed easily because he didn't want to make things harder on his guardian.

They folded different shirts and pants for several minutes. The wardrobe wasn't very big, but it had enough space for all of his clothes, leaving some free space for Yoongi's own stuff.

-Yujin-ah,- Started Yoongi suddenly as he hung his school uniform in the closet, it was black and it smelled like the detergent his mom liked. Yujin hated it in a very sad way.- I know that you don't like coming here and that it's like starting over, which sucks. I get it, I really do.- Yujin believed him, he knew that Yoongi didn't live in Incheon before he was born.- But I promise you that it'll get better. And Jiyoo is not as mean as she looks, you'll see, you'll like it here.

He winked with a faint smile at Yujin for good measure, but he wasn't completely convinced by the words of encouragement.

-No, I won't,- Yujin said, ignoring the last part of his guardian's speech.- I don't have any friends and everyone will know each other from their previous schools... And they'll make fun of my accent.- He looked to the side.

Yoongi scoffed,- Yeah right, like you won't become friends with the entire class on the first day.- Yoongi turned to the clothes in his last backpack absent-mindedly.- Relax kid, everything straightens itself in the end, you simply have keep calm and let yourself get carried by the flow. And no one will care about your accent, it's perfect.

Yujin wanted to believe him badly, but he always said weird things that made his classmates laugh, or look at him strangely, so he doubted that he would make friends quickly. He was bad at talking to people, his only friend back home was Joontae, but he didn't count either because they've known each other since they were babies and the two of them were always together. It was Taetae and Jinnie, Jinnie and Taetae.

The other boy had a lot of friends at school but he always invited Yujin and Yujin alone at his sleepovers, no matter how many kids at school wanted to get invited instead weird Jinnie. Joontae always made him laugh with bad jokes and funny faces, even if Yujin didn't have other friends and he always tagged along with him annoyingly. Yujin missed Joontae very much. He wanted to cry because no one would share his lunch with him anymore and no one would listen to the weird American music he liked.

-Yujin-ah, what's wrong?- Asked Yoongi startled. He quickly knelt on the floor to stand at an eye level with him. Yujin was swiftly reminded that he was the shortest in his class and everyone made fun of him for that too. Everyone except Joontae who was all the way back in Incheon.

-I-I miss Taetae.- Yujin whimpered, he buried his face in his arms trying to stop himself from crying in front of Yoongi.

-Oh, Yujin-ah,- Yoongi hugged him tightly.- I know buddy, I promise that you'll see him soon.

He doubted that, he really did. Yujin's been gone for less than a day but he feels like Taetae wouldn't want to talk to him ever again.

-You can always chat with him online, you know?- Yoongi smiled triumphantly as they knocked foreheads together.

-It's not the same,- Yujin mumbled, burying his face in the crook of Yoongi's neck, he smelled like cologne and fresh laundry.

-You can also make video calls with him, you'll continue on just as before.- Yoongi rubbed soothingly his quivering back.

-N-no.- He whimpered.- He won't want to talk to me anymore, I hate it.- Yujin sobbed, shoulders convulsing with each deep breath he took.- I left Incheon.- He was sure he left wet splotches on his hyung's shirt, embarrassed he to pull away from Yoongi's firm grip.

-Ah, ah, ah!- Yoongi exclaimed as he clung to his small body.- Where do you think you are going? I need my daily dose of hugs.

-But hyung, your shirt!- Yujin tried to pull away once more, bracing his hands against the other's big chest. The bodyguard's grip on his waist only tightened and he struggled to escape the death grip that suffocated him, his curled fists hitting on the man's shoulders.

-I need it,- Yoongi whined.- I'll die if I don't hug you once a day! How could you do this to me? Haven't I raised you on my own back!?

-Hyung!- Yujin shouted, his face was reddening from embarrassment. Involuntarily, his mouth curled up in a smile, then the older emitted a sound not unlike a kicked puppy and Yujin couldn't take it anymore. He laughed, feeling better for the first time in a week.

They finished unpacking Yujin's stuff, then Yoongi went back to the car for his own luggage. Left alone, he thought it was the best moment to sate his curiosity and explore the huge apartment, but the probability of getting caught by aunt Jiyoo stopped him mid-stride. He paced in the room looking at each corner, finally he reached the single window. Aunt Jiyoo's house was on the twenty-fifth floor. That was high by normal standards, however, in the asphalt jungle of Seoul, that level was minimal. Tall skyscrapers covered the lower buildings and levels in partial shadow and this one was no exception. 

Still, the view was magnificent, the sunset painted every single sharp corner and plain surface in warm yellows and oranges, while the city lights began to glow. For a moment it didn't seem so bad. 

Yoongi came back sooner than expected, looking huffy and annoyed. They unpacked his stuff too just in time for aunt Jiyoo to leave the house with a deafening bang of the front door. Yujin supposed that she liked to be dramatic like that.

Dinner was shared and enjoyed, if still melancholic from the day's emotions. Aunt Jiyoo's fridge didn't hold anything spectacular for them but scrambled eggs with kimchi would do for a quick, halfhearted meal. After that, as per request, they called his mom.

-Seoyeon-noona, how are you?- Started Yoongi, turning his phone on speaker.

-Mom!- Yujin scrambled from his seat on the sofa.

-Hello Yoongi-hyung, I'm fine, how's Yunnie?- Asked his mom with her gentle voice, she sounded happy.

-Mom!- He called his mother once again. Yoongi put down the phone on the kitchen table for him and continued to watch the TV show they had on the giant flat-screen in the living-room. The TV was one thing about aunt Jiyoo that he thought that was cool. Yujin hurried over to the table and climbed one of the wooden chairs beside it.

-Mom, I miss you so, so, so, much. I want to go back home! Please, can I go back?!- He pleaded, clasping his hands.

His mom sighed, never a good sign as far as he was concerned.

-Yunnie, we've talked about this, you won't come back to Incheon for quite some time.- He failed completely to understand her motives, but if she said he had to leave, then it had to be done.

He poked his tongue out anyway even if his mom couldn't see it. He balanced his elbows on the wooden table, his knees firmly planted on the seat of the chair.

-I know you don't understand why we sent you with Jiyoo-ah, but we do it because we want you safe sweety. Please bear it for us okay? Mommy wants you safe. I know that you're sad but you can always talk to Taetae.

He pouted. He knew that they wanted to keep him safe but he didn't like it. The mention of Joontae soured his mood even further.

-Yoongi-hyung said the same, but it's not that easy. Taetae's too far away! I want to play with him. The other kids at school will probably think that I'm weird.- Joontae never made fun of him like that, he didn't add.

-That's not true!- His mom exclaimed indignantly.- My son is a sweet boy, they won't know what hit them. You'll do great and you can't convince me otherwise young man!-She huffed annoyed.- As for friends, well, you can always make new ones. It's _fine_ if they're not many, they have to be good, that's all.

Yujin bit at his cheek to stop himself from complaining to her once more, she was only saying it because she was his mom and that was what moms did, saying that their kids are the best. He hoped that a part of it was true though, he hoped that there was something nice about him that people liked.

-Okay.- He answered her just to keep her from worrying. She hummed.

-How's at aunt Jiyoo's, baby?

He frowned at the question. Aunt Jiyoo.

-It's fine, I have this big room with a double bed, and Yoongi-hyung promised that he'd buy me a desk so I can do my homework. And she has this big TV, but I haven't asked if I can plug in my PS3.- Yujin tried to say only good things about his aunt, even if they haven't talked much (they haven't talked at all) and she was pretty mean to Yoongi.- Oh! And she has paintings all over, with paint pots on the floor! They leave a mess everywhere but I'm sure that aunt Jiyoo doesn't care, that's really weird!

His mom hummed and ahed as he told her about his aunt, even though Yujin was pretty sure that it wasn't that interesting, but again, that was what moms did. He finished telling her about everything he'd seen so far, trying to make it sound as interesting as she pretended it to be.

-That's great, Yunnie, I'm glad you're having a good time.- He didn't, but he couldn't tell her otherwise.- But I have a meeting with Mrs. Park and I have to talk to Yoongi-yah really quick.

-Okay!- He chirped, with a deep breath he called his hyung back.- Yoongi-hyuuuung! Mom wants to talk to you about adult stuff!

-Inside voice, Yujin!- Both Yoongi and his mom scolded him at the same time for his volume, laughing instantly after, so Yujin patted himself on the back for that one.

-I'm coming.- Called back his bodyguard. Yoongi took the phone from his hand with a quick pat on his head as Yujin held the device to him.

Yujin left the kitchen to watch some more TV. There was going to be a live TV-show with Love H, a hip-hop Idol he liked. He watched the purple-headed rapper announce a comeback album and two collaborations with some underground artists. Yujin wouldn't buy his album but his streaming playlist was ready to go. After that, he spent some good ten minutes singing his hits as he performed infront of the screaming public, dancing uncoordinately alone in the livingroom.

Before he knew it, Yoongi was making him go to bed and the sky outside was dark.

-But it's Friday! Please let me stay some more.- He pleaded. He wasn't tired anyway, and Love H was giving an interview. He couldn't miss that for sleep. Hah! He was thirteen, he knew when he had to sleep and when not.

-No can do kiddo. Your mom was very specific.- Said Yoongi as he pulled him from the couch. Unwillingly, Yujin let himself get coerced in his pajamas and in the bed of his new room. After some pleading on his side that didn't get him anywhere, he finally threw himself on the soft mattress. His eyes closed instantly.

-I'm not tired.- He protested one last time. Yoongi chuckled.

-We have things to do tomorrow, aunt Jiyoo and I have to talk about some things and you and I need to speak with your dance instructors.- Yoongi sat at the edge of the bed wearing sleeping clothes himself.

Yujin scooted more towards the wall to leave space for his hyung with a defeated pout, and finally resigned himself to an earlier bedtime. But the mention of his new dance tutors made him perk up wide awake. It was an agreement he made with his mother, since no dance studio would let him practice ballet, hip-hop and contemporary dance at the same time.

The classes overlapped more often than not, and the teachers refused to let him do the three things at the same time so as to not overwhelm him, so Yujin had to get private tutors. After a detailed conversation with his mother that set a lot of rules, of course. A lot of rules.

-Don't worry,- Reassured Yoongi. The older man quickly turned off the lights and laid beside him.- Your mom made sure to get you two tutors, we'll see how it all goes from that.

Yoongi was warm besides him, like a furnace, and his voice was deep and gravelly. His chest rumbled when he talked and Yujin quickly drifted of to sleep, securely tucked against the other's broad chest.

* * *

Seongyeol is embarrassingly deep in debt with Sehwan.

Not for anything serious like money or something like that, but for something that mattered a lot to him, to the point he felt morally obligated call himself Sehwan's friend.

-...and It's not my fault that Soomi thought that doing it in the office was a good idea. I didn't do anything wrong...

It really showed Seongyeol that there were people that cared enough to notice the small details. Sehwan was one of them, the kind of person that saw how Seongyeol survived on cheap ramyeon packets, all chicken flavoured. The kind of person that decided that it wasn't healthy and decided to fix his horrendous diet despite his vehement protests.

-...so I told Hyorin, shouldn't we file some sort of paperwork? A complaint, something?- even though I didn't fucking want to...

The jjimdak Sehwan cooked that day tasted like heaven and in those two days that the braised chicken lasted, Seongyeol felt pampered like a prince. It was pretty simple in his mind, to declare his undying loyalty and devotion over a dish that was made with the essence of a budding friendship in it.

-...but you know how it is, Jeongie is always right I have to suck up to them at every opportunity, he's so bright, I'm always so impressed by him...

But was it worth this? Was it worth this torture? This suffering of his immortal soul? He still hadn't decided twenty minutes in their weekly coffee date where neither of them drank actual coffee. He was heavily debating the issue in his mind, weighing the pros and cons.

-...did I tell you about the look she sent me? I felt ashamed at first, but holy shit was it unsanitary...

On one hand he had free food that tasted delicious, coupled with a free living heater, willing enough to cuddle without snide comments on Seongyeol's clinginess, that was readily available. But Seongyeol wasn't clingy, he swore, was an ex-underground rapper that got drunk and has won a lot of fights. He wasn't cute either. Damn it.

The bad side of it all however... 

-...that's all I have to say, I'm done with this trash. Seongyeol-ah thank you for listening hon, I know that you hate gossiping. I needed to get it off my chest it really bothered me.- Sehwan fiddled with the napkin he used to wipe his mouth.- I'm sorry for bothering you, really, please tell me about your week.

Sehwan smiled brightly at him and Seongcheol begrudgingly admitted that the good things outnumbered the negatives he had listed previously. Because Sehwan was very kind, he felt the need to reiterate, selfless almost. Too kind to ignore or brush off, with a curt 'it was fine, thanks'.

-I was great, Lee PD-nim told me that 'Butter's Knife' was better than my last few songs.- Okay, he preened, but he felt good about the improvement in his songwriting. He had to show something to Sehwan.

Sehwan who shoved a piece of cake in his mouth with rapt attention to what he was saying. It made Seongyeol warm inside.

-You know,- Sehwan messily licked his fingers like the little child he was.- You could always become a producer if it doesn't work out.

'It' being their three member Idol group, if it could be labelled that. Sehwan's warm reassurance left a bitter taste in his mouth, Seongyeol truly wanted to maintain some kind of positive balance between 'we're going to make it big, just wait' and the defeated 'success in the industry is rare and lasts shortly'.

Maybe because of his own confidence, Seongyeol always leaned towards the former and Sehwan's careful balance of optimism and realism always left him feeling dejected.

-Hyung...- He started, not really knowing what to say.- It's... fine I guess.- He amended, not willing to confess the real answer.- I would like that.

No it wasn't 'fine', producing was fun and he enjoyed it greatly but it was the scene that sent his blood pumping. Back when he packed his belongings at the age of fifteen and left for the quiet streets of Wonju, the thing that made the whole affair worth it, was the crowd in shady clubs that got bigger and bigger each night he visited the dingy bars.

He loved performing and he loved feeling the hundreds of stares on him. A quiet job behind a computer couldn't really measure. Not when the thought of a full stadium made him giddy and excited with anticipation. Not when the sweat after each show felt better than any marathon he could run.

But this was Sehwan who cried over cliche TV dramas and once cooed for half an hour to a sugar glider in the pet department. Seongyeol's broken dreams were Sehwan's broken dreams. So yes, becoming a successful producer was an option for the future in front of his hyung.

-Do you think that we need more members?- He changed the topic quickly. Sehwan swallowed piece he was chewing thoughtfully. He shoved one more before answering.

-Yes, but Mr. CEO isn't planning on holding more auditions.- Sehwan mumbled around the last bites of cake, as authentic to the French original as you could get in Seoul.

Seongyeol's good mood from the morning was completely gone. All he felt was dread and fear, they were three in the band. Far too little, the point was for the fans to have many different personalities to choose a favorite from. That meant diversity that they didn't have. Could they be considered a group or were they a trio?

He stared at his hyung, true, the three of them couldn't be more different from each other, but was it enough? No, it wasn't, this was a disaster, a complete and utter disaster. What were they doing?

-Earth to Seongyeol, do you hear me sir.- Teased Sehwan. His smile had an underlying tone of worry.

-Sorry, I was thinking.- He focused his gaze back to the present.

-Aw no, Yeongie-yah, did I put you in a bad mood?

Seongyeol mutely shook his head. He should stop answering to 'Yeongie-yah', it was goddamn embarrassing, he wasn't a kid. The older male tutted disapprovingly.

-It doesn't matter if we're so little, if we make good music the fans will love us. Have more confidence in yourself, dearest dongsaeng.- Sehwan complained,- How come you're so self-assured for everything else?

It was a weak attempt at reassurance, and they both knew it. Talent didn't matter as much as looks. It didn't matter if you were the best dancer, or had the most angelic voice in Korea, the industry would eat your ugly ass alive. Looks were everything.

They paid and left. Seongyeol brooded the whole way back to their share dorm, despite Sehwan's continuous, embarrassing and downright childish methods to cheer him up.

-Ooh, Yeongie!- Sehwan more or less shouted with a disappointed pout. His hyung was pointing at a group of kittens in a pet shop. A few passerby turned around to look at the loud man. Seongyeol hid his blushing face with his hand, unwilling to be associated with his taller band-mate in public.

Two one steps to the side and two forward left enough personal space to simulate a complete lack of association with Sehwan. Seongyeol had a whole year to practice the technique. Too bad that Sehwan always caught on very quickly with an indignant squawk and a scolding that triggered a new wave of secondhand embarrassment.

-Yah! Is this what I get after paying for your food?!

Oh please, just end it all.

* * *

Talking to his new teacher was always nerve-wrecking for Yujin. Not even Yoongi's warm and comforting hand on his shoulder could calm his beating heart. It was fine though, Yujin appreciated Yoongi for trying to comfort him.

-This way,- Yoongi guided him inside the private dance academy. They made their way through a short hallway and to an office.

Yoongi knocked thrice on the closed door. It opened to reveal a middle-aged woman with a tight-looking ponytail and sport clothes. She glanced at Yoongi, then her gaze slid towards Yujin. He smiled faintly to not appear nervous or awkward, she smiled back cheerfully.

-Mr. Min?- She turned towards Yoongi, who was still squeezing Yujin's shoulder.

-Ah, no, I'm not...- Yoongi looked embarrassed.- I'm his guardian at the moment, Mrs. Min couldn't come today... unfortunately.

He added the 'unfortunately' after a small, but obvious pause.

-I see... Come in then.- She smiled wider at them, opening the door to let them in.

Inside was another teacher, the man was seated on a small rectangle table against a wall of the medium-sized office. He looked up from his laptop, Yujin noticed the prominent eye-bags under his eyes and the annoyed furrow of his brow. Yoongi rubbed his shoulder once more, a steady presence behind him.

The man finally took of the bulky headphones he had used to listen to whatever was playing on the screen and walked towards the desk under the largest window in the room.  
He flopped on the chair behind the minimalist desk as both Yujin and Yoongi sat on the two chairs in front of it.

-So, you're...- The man, probably one of Yujin's techers leafed through a small notebook in complete disinterest.- ...Min Yujin here to discuss your... ballet, hip-hop and contemporary dance classes?

He stared skeptically at Yujin from head to toe.

-Yes,- Confirmed Yoongi who caught the not so look stare of the other man.- His mother told me that everything was more or less in order, we need to come up with a schedule, Doyeon Instructor-nim.

Yoongi emphasized his new teacher's, Doyeon's, name in a strange way. Said instructor sent one last contemplative look at him before turning completely towards Yoongi.

-Mr. Min-

-It's Kook.- Curtly, but not harshly, interrupted Yoongi.

Doyeon blinked once with slightly raised eyebrows in surprise. Yoongi looked on steadily.

-Okay, Mr. Kook.- He confirmed. He opened his mouth to say something but the lady that opened the door for them spoke for the first time instead.

-First, introductions!- She smiled widely at Yujin.- Hello, I'm Ra Jeongja, I teach ballet and contemporary dance to young munchkins like you.- She pinched his right cheek somewhat tightly, leaving the skin red and sore.

Yujin blushed and managed to stutter his own introduction, rubbing at his aching cheek.

-I love the color blue, I'm Min Yujin and I'm a high-school student. Hello Jeongja-sunbaenim.- He bowed somewhat awkwardly in his seat.

That was the first thing he always said to strangers. Not his name, not his age, but 'I love the color blue.'. Some people dismissed it thinking that he's being funny, others, like his schoolmates made fun of him, it was Joontae who told him that it sounded really cool.

Yujin started to miss his friend again but managed to ignore the feeling without tearing up. Doyeon snorted slightly with a roll of his eyes.

-I'm Doyeon, I teach hip-hop, call me hyung if you want.- Awkward silence.

Jeongja was not having it, she violently threw a hand around her fellow teacher's shoulders, much to the man's dismay.

-Yah! Don't be so curt.- She squeezed Doyeon so hard that it looked painful.- He appears grumpy, but he's really soft on the inside. Don't worry, Yujin-ah, he'll take good care of you.

She peered down at him once more with raised eyebrows, Doyeon was red in the face, maybe from embarrassment. The teacher grumbled something under his breath with a grimace which made Jeongja smile with a small giggle.

Yujin blinked at his strange new teachers and sent a bewildered look to Yoongi who was covering his mouth with his hand. He seemed angry, judging by his furrowed eyebrows, but the strange twinkle in his eyes betrayed his amusement.

Then they went to business, occasionally they would ask Yujin to pitch in. 'Would you like it to be this or that day? from this or the other hour?' He answered dutifully, ending up with two-hour classes from Monday to Saturday for both contemporary dance and hip-hop. Nothing was mentioned about ballet and Yujin was too shy to ask anything.

Neither Yoongi nor his mom ever mentioned the dance. Some days later he would dare to ask Yoongi about, it only to retract his question the moment his bodyguard dived to the table where he'd put his phone. Finally he managed to wave off Yoongi's concerned hovering and insistence to call the academy 'right this instant', feeling lighter than ever.

And that was that.

Maybe his previous teachers were right in denying him classes that he didn't want in the first place.

* * *

Seongyeol could barely move his limbs to get up from the floor of the studio. Normally dance practice didn't take that much from him but this time he thought that he'd pulled something and it was never going to move back in place.

-Yeongie-yah.- Called Sehwan from the other sided of the room.- Come on kitten, we have vocal lessons and we're done for today.

-Hyung, with all due respect, but fuck you, eat my lily white ass. I'm no kitten.

Jeong laughed grossly.

Seongyeol wasn't on the mood, not for the butchering of his name nor for the cutesy nicknames and even less for more practice, let alone getting up from his sprawling position on the cold, unforgiving floor.

-Well,- Squawked indignantly Sehwan.- A little of respect here, I'm your hyung!

-Yeah, but that's why I said 'with all due respect'.

-Seongyeol!

Jeong laughed harder, almost out of breath while clutching at his aching stomach. It probably sounded like peak comedy to his skinny, antisocial ass.

-Fuck.- Seongyeol moaned to himself, he was very tired. So tired that the hard wood under him felt like a soft bed, clean smelling sheets and all.

-Get up Seongyeol-ah.- Implored Sehwan one more time and Seongyeol's never heard him ask thrice. He was not keen on breaking the record.

-Fine, fine, god, I just want to sleep.

-I know.

Jeong was still smiling when they left the building, weirdo. The cold September air nipped at Seongyeol's cheeks making them redden. He blew at his hands, pulling tightly the soft scarf around his mouth to preserve the heat. He rubbed the warm cloth with two fingers, an awkward gift from Jeong for his birthday. Seongyeol appreciated it in the depths of his shriveled heart.

-Seongyeol-ah,- Said Sehwan quietly.- I talked with Mr. CEO, he's sending a manager-hyung to look for a new member... If he finds someone in a week of course.

-Eh? A scout? For what?- Jeong looked up from his phone with a bewildered expression.

-Yeongie, was worried about our numbers,- Sehwan explained.- So I decided to talk to Mr.CEO and he told me that they could think of something.

It was heartwarming really, that Sehwan had noticed that single comment Seongyeol made almost a week ago and had taken the time to talk to their boss directly to find a solution. It was good to be noticed, Seongyeol learned, it was good to talk to someone who listened. Sadly, he could express his gratefulness with a small smile that didn't feel like enough and probably looked weird and shy. Sehwan answered in kind either way.

It was a small thing, the smallest thing, but those counted the most to Seongyeol.

Jeong just hummed in agreement, but he probably didn't care that much. They made their way silently towards their next class. Jeong was glued to his phone the entire time and Seongyeol wondered how he could walk even faster than them while not really seeing where he was stepping. To be fair, most of the time Seongyeol had trouble with texting too fast so what would he know.

Class was as boring and as tiring as ever, by the time they finished, even Sehwan had trouble with keeping his eyes open.

The walk back to their dorm was slow and ginger, the cold and slightly damp air leaving them frozen and cranky, it was dark and the orange street lamps hurt Seongyeol's existence. His muscles ached from their six hour dance practice, the cold didn't make things better for his aching joints. Without much ado he and Sehwan jumped right into their bathroom to shower without wasting too much water both for Jeong's and the power bill's sake.

Warm and slightly relaxed from the hot water Seongyeol plopped himself on their small, ratty couch to finish the song he'd started yesterday before passing out for exhaustion.

Thirty minutes later he was awaken by a gentle, but firm shaking of his shoulder. He grumbled at the bold fucker who thought it was good idea.

-Yeongie-yah, wake up dinner is ready.- Sehwan tugged lightly at a stray lock of hair that hung on his face. Seongyeol was soft for two people in this world only really, so he let himself be dragged to their small table by the much stronger leader of their group. He was also very hungry, his rumbling stomach let him know.

Dinner was a heavenly smelling budae-jjigae, cheap, but delicious, and as healthy as Sehwan could make the highly caloric stew. He squeezed himself in the seat beside Jeong who was already wolfing down his generous portion without waiting for them to start first. Seongyeol bet that Sehwan actually cooked for nine, not for three, with the amount their disrespectful little vacuum cleaner consumed.

-Move over, brat.- He roughly shoved at Jeong's ever growing shoulders to make space for himself.

The hot steam of the jjigae hit his face and he poked at the chunk of spam that looked most appetizing.


	2. Fog and Sunshine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two new points of vision, plus a small extra from the previous chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, hey. This thing has four hits already and I almost had a heart attack. This kinda personal, so yeah...  
> Anyway, no beta, we die like (wo)men. (Is that how you use that meme?)
> 
> Recently I fell in love with the fake texts/tweets so you'll be seeing a lot of that too.
> 
> And to end this chapter note in a good way, what I said in Chapter 1 still stands. Any constructive criticism is highly encouraged, so you're free to roast me (ಥ‿ಥ)

Jeong never really noticed before, but he passed by a homeless person every time he went to school. He never really noticed, because he was constantly glued to his phone, it only took a single distraction, a cough in the humid air, to make him look startedly towards the source of the noise.

He quickly turned towards his screen unwilling to be caught staring, the man's clothes were wet but he probably forgot his umbrella in the morning rain or something. Nothing out of the ordinary, it was just a dude sitting on a bench. Jeong moved on without a second glance, laughing quietly at Minwoo's dumb selca.

His routine went on without a hitch, he came and went to school on the same path, never looking up again.

He remembered one particular Monday though, mostly because Sehwan managed to get on every single nerve he possessed with insistent and repetitive 'Put on some warm clothes, Jeongie-yah!'. Shut up, he snapped silently on his way to school, he was late didn't have the time to change for the third time because his mothering hyung was cold and that automatically meant that Jeong himself was cold too.

Whatever. The other reason why he remembered that ordinary Monday was because it was raining pretty heavily. It rained a lot, he suspected that the majority of his classes would be suspended simply because a lot of his peers wouldn't be able to get to the school.

He went anyway, with his boots and his heavy raincoat (thank you, hyung.) , a ST⛤R umbrella (thanks again, hyung) kept him dry from the heavy sheets of rainwater that pelted the streets of Seoul.

He purposely stepped on any puddle he found, just to see the water splash everywhere. His phone was tucked safely in the pocket of his coat, so he could peacefully enjoy the loud patter of rain against concrete. He saw a dark shape from the corner of his eye, it was the same hyung from weeks ago.

He stopped abruptly two steps past the lonely bench on a deserted street in Seoul. He turned on his heel to face the poor sod, the rain was falling mercilessly. He approached with care and trust his umbrella forward to stop the steady downpour from falling over the man.

-Um...- The man looked at him from behind his black face mask with something akin to awe. Shit. It made him self-conscious.- Hi.- He waved awkwardly with a toothy smile. A fat raindrop hit his exposed nape, Jeong shuddered at the unwelcome sensation.

The other blinked slowly, a wet strand of hair was plastered to his forehead, he was trembling.

-Hey hyung, I'm sorry for disturbing,- He shifted from his slightly crouched position restlessly.- But would you like something from the coffee shop? Tea? Coffee?- He pointed at the local just behind him, mentally counting the change he had left in his wallet. Just enough for something warm.

He waited for an answer, but the other just stared at him with an unreadable look on his masked face.

-It's too cold... and wet, to stay outside, I mean.- He offered as an explanation. But really, wouldn't the other know better than him? He was homeless, after all.

-I'm not homeless.- The other muttered.

Oops, Jeong had said that out loud. Whatever, he was just as poor as the other... Or maybe not, he amended belatedly, the Psyche trainers the older man was wearing could pay for his living expenses for the next five to six years.

-Oh,- He started without knowing how to continue,- Well... I'm sorry for assuming, excuse me.- With a last apologetic bow he straightened fully and reasoned that no one from his class would be in school anyway. He was ready for a day of lazing around with his hyungs and nursing his injured pride.

-Wait.- Jeong stopped at the slightly panicked but otherwise pretty leveled voice.- Wait,  
I'm not homeless, but I come here often enough, so- anyway, I...- He hesitated.- I'll accept the offer, if you let me pay for your coffee in return.

Jeong blinked, taken aback. He stared for a moment, a single drop of rainwater has fallen on the man, making it's way down to be absorbed by the already soaked cloth of the face-mask.

-I don't drink coffee.- He finally mumbled from behind his thick scarf (...thanks one more time, hyung)

-Is that a yes I'm hearing?

-Hyung, I'm fifteen, before we go anywhere.- He warned just in case.

-Wha-? Yeah,- He coughed,- I knew that.

No he didn't, but Jeong could let it pass this one time since he was tall for his age and was covered in twenty different articles of clothing.

-I thought you were twelve.- Jeong couldn't let _that_  pass, to pretend like he knew Jeong was a minor is okay, to mock his age like that was not.

-Rude.- He pouted childishly, he was really weak like that around adults.- I'll scream and you can't stop me.

-What!- The other panicked.- Shit, kid no, I'm sorry, please don't scream, you'll get me in a lot of trouble. I'll buy you anything you want, I'm rich I promise!

Jeong sniffed disdainfully, what a wimp.

-I'm Kim Minjoon,- The other introduced himself cautiously, as if he waited for some kind of reaction.

Jeong eyed the other- Minjoon- carefully.

-Minjoon-hyung~- He sing-sang in satisfaction after a nervous pause, dear Minjoonie was going to be wrapped around his finger pretty soon. And his natural charm was working already, judging by Minjoon's softening expression.- I'm Jeong.

He decided that it was safe to give his first name, and they were going to a public place, so he's as safe as he gets at eight in the morning in Seoul.

-What are you doing outside at this time,- Minjoon asked as they ordered their drinks, tea for Jeong, coffee for Minjoon.- Visiting a friend?

-Hmmm no,- Jeong winced at the sensitive topic, he didn't have any friends.- I was going to school, but that was a bust.- He said as he counted the coins in his hand with a thumb.- And you, Minjoon-hyung, what do you do alone in cold wet bench this early, and in this weather.

-...I was remembering some things, the rain helped me think.

-Ah, I see.- He didn't, but to each his own.

They sat on the table closest to to the cafe's huge window in silence. It was a bit awkward. Jeong saw Minjoon's grimace from behind the mask he still hadn't taken off. Probably because wet clothes stuck everywhere. Jeong was about to do the stupidest thing.

-Hyung do you want to come home?- He blurted. There it is. The stupid thing. He didn't blame Minjoon from snorting his gulp of coffee all over the table.- To change your clothes I mean!

-Oh my god. I'm _so_  sorry.- Minjoon scrambled for the napkin dispenser.

He rushed to help the elder man wipe the table with some paper napkins. God, that was embarrassing, he thought with a furious blush, truly in his top ten most regrettable moments.

-To change your clothes,- He repeated pitifully.- I live nearby and my hyung is about as tall as you. I'm sure that something will fit you.

It was stupid, what he was doing, first because Minjoon was a stranger in his purest form and second because his hyungs would be livid. But whatever, he had little but he was willing to share. (Probably at the cost of his life, but who cares?).

Shit. Fuck. Heck. Diddly darn. Frick-frack. Frick Damn it. He sighed through his nose. He was hopeless.

Minjoon was debating heavily with himself, he looked like he either wanted to refuse, indignant, or accept gratefully.

-Okay. But you shouldn't do that. Ever.- He stared sternly at him, his whole demeanor changing from meek to authoritative.- I only agree because I trust myself. If I ever see you inviting strangers to your house again...-- He let the threat hang.

Jeong smiled so wide that his cheeks started to hurt.

 

* * *

 

Sehwan has heard that kids like to drag in strays from the streets, poor misfortunate animals to take care of because they were defenseless and cute. In fact, his own cousins did that once or twice, when they were little and little kitties were the most delightful creatures in the farm. But he didn't think that Jeong was like that, the kid was as sharp as a tack under the thick layer of sweetness, mature, with one goal and not prone to distractions. Not some western cliche.

Sehwan didn't expect the goddamn, most famous hip-hop star in Korea to be dragged in their apartment like a stray cat. The guy looked pitiful, nothing like the confident, almost cocky presence in his music videos and live shows. Seongyeol would be outraged by the pitiful look of one of his favorite artists. He peered at said dozing dongsaeng besides him.

He pinched the young rapper's toe without letting the rapper out of his sight. He squirmed pathetically under his gaze.

-Be right back!- Screamed Jeong without giving any explanation, his shoes were thrown haphazardly on the door.

Sehwan frowned at the water that was pooling around the strange man in his house that shifted uncomfortably.

-Please don't tell him anything.- The intruder pleaded as soon as they were left alone. Sehwan only raised his eyebrows in complete distress and indignation, a sharp backwards tilt of his head punctuated his complete and utter confusion. He quickly twisted towards the door, looking towards the hallway in the hopes that Jeong would appear again and answer his many questions. What is this tall, soggy man doing in his living room?

Seongyeol shifted besides him, always difficult to awake. Sehwan gripped his thin ankle and squeezed the frail limb twice to alert the younger of the intrusion. Finally, his companion blinked blearily in a valiant effort to wake up. His gaze shifted from the quiet TV to soaking Kim Minjoon. Tall, dark and damp immediately woke Seongyeol awake and alert.

A comical squinting look that made Kim quiver, apparently confirmed the young member's suspicions.

-What are you doing with our kid, Farewell to Summer?- Asked Seongyeol, quick and to the point, he wasn't even phased. Sehwan was taken aback, in the year he's known his dongsaeng, he's never heard him use such a tone. The tall man's curled position on the sofa didn't intimidate anyone, but the cold protectiveness of his voice, coupled with a terse expression apparently sent a shiver down their (unexpected) guest's back. That, or the pointed use of his stage name, the name that sold millions of albums used in the most threatening way.

-I-I, what? I'm sorry, I'm very sorry- Stuttered Kim.

Seongyeol didn't let him finish the sentence.

-I ain't gonna repeat myself.- Hoarsely rasped Seongyeol, what appeared to be a pocket knife appearing in his long-fingered grasp. The blade was short, but it looked razor-sharp, just like Seongyeol himself.

-Seongyeol!- Sehwan shrieked, completely stunned.- Put that thing where it came from or so help me!

Minjoon paled alarmingly and Sehwan distantly thought about the trouble they'd get in if the award-winning artist passed out on their carpet. The absurdness jumbled his thoughts, there was only so much surrealism that a human being can take.

-I FOUND IT!- Burst in Jeong with a bundle of clothes clenched in his small hands. Seongyeol managed one last sharp jerk of his head in warning before hastily hiding the incriminating tool somewhere under his thighs. Sehwan, finally coherent enough to find it funny, quickly wiped his disbelieving expression for a grin that he couldn't hide no matter how much he wanted to.

The frightened rapper flew to their bathroom with the clothes in hand that the willful maknae had given to him. After a few tense seconds of awkward goodbyes their apartment was blissfully silent.

-We need to talk with him.- Sehwan muttered finally, then groaned when his feet touched the cold floor. Someone had to mop up the puddle.

-About what?- Slurred Seongyeol.

-About what?!- Sehwan whipped his head to stare at the sprawled man on the couch.- What do you mean about what? About the strange _man_  he let inside our house and gave my fourth favorite sweater to.

-But he's famous,- Pointed out Seongyeol as if it was a valid argument.

-Wha-what do you mean he's famous!?- Sehwan's voice rose, he was getting hysterical.- Who cares if he's famous?! He's alone with Jeong!- He took a deep breath, not to calm his temper down but to continue to scream at the stubborn little idiot that was _texting_ _on_ _the_ _phone_.- Seongyeol! Jeongie's fifteen!

-Oh my god.- Groaned Seongyeol.- Stop shouting maybe? I'm texting him right now, we're meeting at the cafe downstairs.- Finally the young rapper deemed to look him in the face over the cushion of the tattered sofa.- You're red in the face, go change, we're leaving in ten.

Sehwan let himself be ordered around just like that, all previous anger leaving him disoriented an worried. A thick coat and a second pair of warm sweatpants after, Sehwan power-walked down the stairs to the little cafe. Seonyeol trailed reluctantly after him only to be dragged forcefully by the hand towards their destination.

-Let me go.- Hissed the younger.

-No. Should've walked faster, this is an emergency.- Sehwan could feel Seongyeol's eye-roll, followed by an exasperated sigh.

They got there in record time, what should have been ten minutes were cut to the astonishing five. Seongyeol threw himself on the chair in front of a smug looking Jeong  with a lazy smirk. Sehwan slowed down just for appearances, it wouldn't do to look so shaken up, he had to impose more than anything.

Sehwan blatantly eyed the suspicious man without care about manners. Kim returned the stare looking more like a startled animal than a human being.

-Hyuuung!- Greeted Jeong with a huge (cute) smile and rapid gestures towards the only free seat on the table.- Come on sit here!- He said as if Sehwan would consider sitting everywhere else in the goddamn building.  
  
-Inside voice Jeongie,- He scolded a little cross with the situation.- And you...- He turned to the hunched figure sitting besides their maknae.

-Me, sir,- Kim stuttered.

-Yes, you.- He sat down.- Why shouldn't I call the police on you?

-Oh no, please don't, I-I didn't do anything wrong, he was the one who started the entire thing,- Kim tripped over his words to plead for mercy, not caring that he threw his young rescuer under the bus.

-Oh?- Sehwan turned toward Jeong, the brat's fake smile didn't fool anyone.- And pray tell, why did you invite a stranger in our house?

-That's what I asked him,- Said Kim indignantly.

Sehwan chose to ignore the rapper in front of him, just like he chose to ignore Seongyeol's grumbling into the scarf he'd wrapped around his neck. Crazies, all of them. He waited for an answer with raised eyebrows.  
  
-I don't know,- Shrugged Jeong sullenly,- It's just clothes, man.

-That's not the point!- Seethes Sehwan.

-I know, okay?

Jeong is a good kid, kind (too kind he's learning), very gentle, polite, respectful with his elders, Sehwan can't get mad at him really. After all, Jeong would be the first to reproach himself. His rage shimmered down to bright embers, warm.

He sighed.

-Just...- A hand came to rub pinch the bridge of his nose. He felt tired.- Be back for the classes. We start at five.

-Okay.- He stared at Jeong's expression, he had a slight pout, he was upset with the situation just as much as Sehwan himself. All of them were tired.

Without further ado he dragged pliant Seongyeol behind him and with a decisive snap of their umbrella they left the cafe. The loud drops of rain against the flexible plastic fiber drowned his thoughts. Sehwan breathed out, no condensation came out of his mouth.

-You know, it's a weird coincidence, if you think about it.- Started Seongyeol. Seonyeol never talked first, he only spoke when spoken to.

-It is,- He took Seongyeol's hand in his own enjoying the contact.- And they won't be seeing each other ever again, so I'm calm for now.

-Why wouldn't they see each other again?- Sehwan looked down at the much shorter boy, his own gaze stubbornly nailed on the asphalt.

-Because, Kim's an Idol, he has a different life from us kitten.- Seongyeol made a soft noise of complaint at the nickname that Sehwan ignored.- Jeong goes to school and to practice. I don't see them interacting all that often.

-Well now that you say it I feel pretty dumb,- Complained Seongyeol.

Sehwan huffed a small laugh and stepped in a puddle sending droplets of water all over their pants, they didn't even notice.

 

* * *

  
 Seongyeol was tired.

-Again,- Said Seong, their dance instructor-slash-choreographer.

He groaned in despair, feeling the telltale prickle of the tears of frustration that pooled in his eyes.

-Okay.- Agreed Sehwan between gulps of air, he hung his head to concentrate on his breathing. The leader's chest heaved, desperate to provide air to his strained muscles.

Seongyeol crouched with his heels pressed flat against the wooden floor of their small practice room. A bead of sweat crawled downwards his temple, tickling the side of his face, he wiped it desperately.

In those moments he felt like a failure. He wanted to be like Sehwan who never complained no matter how difficult it became, or however tiring seemed the task. He wanted to be like Jeong, who was very talented.

A finger tapped his shoulder, he looked up and up, and up.

-Have some water hyung.- Said Jeong simply, an intense look of worry tightened his features. He looked like a sleepy puppy to Seongyeol.

With a grateful nod he opened the plastic bottle, reused several times to save money. He greedily gulped the tap water. Jeong pressed a small towel to his sweaty neck, hanging the piece of cloth over his shoulder for him to use to wipe his sweat when he was done drinking.

-Don't drink so fast, it's better if you go slowly,- Advised Jeong from above him.- It's gonna feel all gross when we start to move around again.

Seongyeol was pretty familiar with the uncomfortable feeling of water sloshing in his empty stomach. He stopped drinking the precious liquid to send a nod at the twiggy teen. He prayed for a few more moments of rest. He wasn't the luckiest of people.

-Come on!- Prompted their dance teacher, her voice had the Pavlovian effect on him, it reminded Seongyeol of how tire he was and the hour and half of practice he still had to go through. Tears stung in his eyes again but they never pooled to threaten to fall.

He took a deep breath to relax his fried nerves, it didn't work as much as he wanted it to. Sehwan sent him a empathetic look as they got in the initial position of the choreography Seong had chosen for them to learn. At least he wasn't alone in his suffering.

The music disrupted the quiet in the room. Thanks, he hated it. Seong was determined to make him hate pop music. If he had to hear 'Ya No Quiero Ná' with it's harsh beat drop that made them twist their bodies in such creative ways he would have jump out the window, taking the shitty speakers with him.

They danced and twisted, and jerked their bodies around in practiced sinc. Dynamism, Seongyeol supposed was what she was going for. They had to be fast, precise and flexible, everything he wasn't and would never be.

After the following three minutes and eleven seconds of pure torture for the soul and body, the song ended for the fifty-third time (he wasn't counting, Jeong was) she stared at his flushed face and declared a break of five minutes. They still had an hour and a half to go, but it was five minutes of absolute rest.

Seongyeol praised every supernatural being with the powers to _make her stop_. He stretched under Sehwan's warning gaze before plopping his butt on the floor.

-Waaaah, what a day,- Fake cried Jeong besides him.- I'm so, so tired.

The maknae bent forward from his cross-legged position to make his forehead touch the floor. He stayed like that for a minute, Seongyeol pressed his hand on the younger's broad back to see if he could bend his body even more.

-Nnngggh,- Jeong groaned,- Press more, this is nothing.

-How come you're so flexible?- Asked Seongyeol.

-Can you do a split?- Piped Sehwan excitedly.

-Yeah,- Said the kid and proceeded to do just that, as smoothly as humanly possible.

-You make it look so easy!- Praised their leader, clapping his hands in praise.

-I'm just glad that I didn't get rusty.- Smiled shyly the youngest.

Seongyeol, unwilling to see Sehwan bust fat uwus over the teenager, tuned the duo out.

 

* * *

 

Jeong ran forward, smelling the crisp night air. Behind him Sehwan and Seongyeol walk in silence, Sehwan was probably holding the second oldest by the arm. He stopped to wait for them, enjoying this small moment of piece and complete silence. He fell in line besides Seongyeol seamlessly when they finally caught up. Thank god it was Friday, he would have killed himself if tomorrow he had to go to school.

As if on cue, his phone buzzed in his pocket.

 

 

Fucking maths, he hated them numbers and shit as just much as he hated physics.

-Fuck-aaaaah!- He complained to the empty street.

-Jeongie-ah?- Asked a confused and mildly concerned Sehwan.

-I- He sighed.- Hyung would you mind helping me study for my exam this Monday?

Seongyeol cackled at the back of his throat with a mocking sideways glance. Jeong had no qualms to punch his skinny shoulder.

-Don't make fun of me!- He whined.

-I'm not making fun of you, I'm mocking you.- He egged on with a smug smirk.- But really. You can paint but not solve an equation?

-Hyuuuuuung!- He desperately turned towards Sehwan.- Make him stop.

-Seongyeol, you better stop antagonizing the baby.- Sehwan didn't even look away from the night sky. Jeong pouted.

-What's wrong with the baby? He'll study what needs to be studied,- Long fingers pinched Jeong's sides.

-Hyung, make him stop!- Jeong squealed pitifully hoping to tug at some heartstrings.

-Seongyeol you better stop or there won't be dinner.

-Hmpf.- Seongyeol muttered darkly. Jeong knew that there would be consequences once they got home. He quickly scuttled to the other side of the pavement to hug Sehwan's arm tightly in a futile attempt to warm his freezing body. That, and to escape Seogyeol's cruel fingers.

-Are you cold?- Sehwan disentangled his arm from Jeong's grip to try and shield the younger teen from the chilly night with his jacket.

Jeong nodded slightly into his hyung's side, the extra layer didn't really do anything for his cold hands or nose, not even to warm him in general, but it would do for now.

 

* * *

 

_"Where's my mind? Maybe it's in the gutter? Where I left my lover. What an expensive fate..."_

The soft female voice accompanied by some groovy melody drifted through the apartment. Sehwan hovered over the pan, getting a generous whiff of the drifting vapor. He inhaled the scent of the kimchi fried rice and deemed dinner ready to be served.

-Jeong-ah, come to put the table.- Said dongsaeng groaned in complaint but started to get up nonetheless.

Sehwan turned off the stove quickly and hurried to their only bathroom. Two short raps at the door later and he slithered inside the small stuffy room through the small crack he opened.

He stripped down his sweaty practice clothes and tossed the smelly garments in the corner of the bathroom for Jeong to wash later. He alway forgot though.

-Yeongie-ah.- He peeled the curtain to climb in the bathroom, careful to not let water from the shower spray everywhere.

Inside Seongyeol was lathering some sweet smelling shampoo in his scalp, his pale skin was flushed red from the hot water. Sehwan tried not to stare at anything beneath the neck, but goddamn it the small rapper was cute.

-You're staring.- Stated Seongyeol, with his eyes closed.

-How did you know?- Sehwan reached for the soap, he was very sweaty and sticky.

-You always stare.- Teased Seongyeol while rinsing his hair. It smelled like peaches.

Sehwan stayed silent for a moment concentrating on rubbing the bar of soap on his skin.

-You can always tell me if you want me to stop.- The bar had no smell because it was the cheapest option, three in a pack of 1700 won.- We can change the timing a bit I'm sure that Jeong won't mind-

-We talked about it. Stop.

-Okay.

They had indeed talked about it, back in their first months in the same dorm as a needed compromise. Sehwan was very bisexual, and very open about it with people he was close to, it just happened to not be a favorable climate for the LGBT+ community in South Korea.

On the other hand, Seongyeol was straight and closed off about his sexuality. A virgin, in fact, as inexperienced as you got. What a fun night it was, when he found out. It was indeed a strange situation these two had found themselves in- mostly because of Sehwan. Confident of Seongyeol's easy acceptance and borderline indifference to his preferences, Sehwan had proposed to the small rapper something along the lines of 'You want some fuck?'. For which he was rejected awkwardly and with sincere regret, which led to a few weeks of uncomfortable silences and questioning gazes on Jeong's side.

Sehwan tried to keep it friendly, maybe even on a platonic soulmate type of business, if they got to reach that point. But he found his gaze lowering to a pale chest, slightly defined but still on the skinny side, dusted with pale freckles- Yahooooooo!

Sehwan huffed, tearing his gaze towards the tan tiles of the shower. He was horny and frustrated. It wasn't even about Seongyeol, not really. He was shy and sweet under the hard and so sharp to cut your skin exterior, but he was cute in the way that made Sehwan want to cook him meals and drag him off to bed and cuddle. Not to get nasty.

Trust Sehwan to get very nasty. He closed his eyes in exasperation at himself. He needed to go out clubbing someday to never return.

As to the showers together, well, that was a needed compromise. They needed to cut corners, the company paid for their living expenses, yes, but only just so. There's not enough hot water for two, let alone three. It was tough, but they managed, even if Sehwan found himself hating their situation, mostly because of Seongyeol and Jeong than for himself.

Besides, Jeong was a sensitive kid, puberty was rough on everyone. He needed the little amount of personal space that the bathroom provided. And it's not like either of them minded to share, as Seongyeol had assured him repeatedly. They washed each other's backs and the small, innocent interaction pushed Sehwan to the decision of getting laid in a suspicious bar.

Dinner was a quiet affair, Jeong was more preoccupied with his new bias, NoTE or something like that. Sehwan swore that the kid always found a new one every other week or so, if it was a group he liked everyone. Most of the time the groups were male and his fanboying was off the charts, he kinda hoped that it was just a phase. Sometimes it made him wonder.

 

* * *

 

Saturdays were not as busy as every other day of the week, Jeong had time to relax, go to the park, study, violate the legal contract he had painstakingly convinced Vanya and Namseon to sign. Normal stuff, he had fun.

Their manager had explicitly forbidden them to use social media of any type, the signed contract demanded it even, but there's only so much that you can do with an old TV and nothing else to do. Twitter was free and YouTube was amusing, so as long as he didn't show his face, it was alright to indulge in the wonders that the internet had to offer.

The followers boosted his confidence if nothing else.

To be fair, it was an accident. He had managed to get a pretty sweet user name, a strike of pure luck in the distant past of 2015. After that the account went unused for two whole years, Jeong never being one for socializing or over sharing online.

It was fun, and he got to do something pretty special for some people. Here's the thing, Jeong collects celebrity crushes like one might collect stamps. With a twist. Kpop groups, unless heavily promoted by their companies, or, well, the bigger companies who could afford it, were a pretty niche hobby. But that's what Jeong did, he dug and he stalked on the internet to bring one unpopular Idol group or soloist to his followers once a week. At first he started by answering on comments in the bigger twitter accounts like 'I wish there were more artists like him :/' or 'Does anyone know this artist's name?'. Two followers became five, that became ten, then twenty. Jeong did his best to showcase the beginners who couldn't get that much attention with the humble fame he was gaining.

-Jeong-ah, when are you going to study with your friend?- Asked Sehwan as he made them breakfast. The leader cooked so often for them that Jeong felt bad to see him slave over the stove at every meal. But neither him nor Seongyeol knew how to cook. So.

Jeong looked at his phone, the white numbers stared back. It was 10:24 in the morning. A Saturday.

-We're meeting at the library at eleven.

-You better hurry then.- Said Sehwan, as happy as a clam. Jeong was glad he was having a good morning.

-Yeah.- He murmured.- Oh! Hyung remember you promised to help me with the exam, after. Pleeeeease?- He begged with a toothy smile before speeding off to their shared room.'

Just as he reached for the door handle Seongyeol banged the entire thing against the wall, probably leaving an even deeper dent.

-Seongyeol you better stop slamming the goddamn door!- Screamed Sehwan from the kitchen. Both Jeong and Seongyeol cringed at the elder's tone. Then Jeong laughed mockingly at his hyung while squeezing in between the space between the door frame and and the other's small body. He got a pinch to the side for his troubles.

 

* * *

 

-Hyung can I talk to you about something?

Sehwan looked up from the math problem both Jeong and him were hovering over. Jeong's expression was calm, he had thought about whatever he wanted to talk about for a while

-Hmmmm?- He hummed in acknowledgement.

-I've been thinking about... love.- Jeong started, the use of the word 'love' was hesitant, his homework long forgotten. The teen fiddled with the pencil he was holding.

-Oh?- Asked Sehwan. Love. Even he didn't think much about the topic, it was a deep fear of his.- What about it?

-Well I've been hanging out with Minwoo a lot lately- Sehwan's phone rang. He wanted to hang up so bad right now, but Manager Hwang's name flashed demandingly on the screen.

-I'm so sorry, Jeong-ah, I promise you I'll hear you in a second.- Seeing the slightly irritated look on the maknae's face, he stepped into the small bedroom while answering the phone.

-Hwang-ssi, good evening, how can I help you?- He asked politely.

-Ah, Sehwan-ah, good evening to you too.- The elder man answered a bit curt.- I'm calling about the scouting we've been doing this week.

-Yes?- He sat down on Jeong's bed, it was unmade, he'd told the brat to fix it this morning.

-We found you a fourth member.

-Pardon?- He asked with raised eyebrows,- I'm missing some things sir, was there an audition already?

-No, but we want you to be present,  at least you as a leader, set an example, get familiar. It was a last minute arrangement and the boy's mother was hesitating but from what I've seen he has potential.

-Um,- He shook his head, the scouts worked fast, administration even faster, from what he'd learned.- When is the audition?

-Monday, at ten. Try not to scare him, kid, he's skittish.- The manager laughed at his own joke and Sehwan let a small, if fake, chuckle.

-Okay, sir I'll try, have a good weekend,- He prepared to end the conversation.- Thank you for calling me.

-Have a good weekend too, kiddo.- Before Sehwan could take the phone away from his ear the elder man said one more thing.- And it's hyung, not sir.

-Haha, noted hyung, see you on Monday.- The fuck I will, he took Seongyeol's juice because it had too much sugar and he was 'going to get fat', the guy hadn't eaten all day, he thought with a resentful grimace at the phone.

He returned to the corner they called dining room/kitchen (after making Jeong's bed, of course). The younger was typing something on his phone until Sehwan softly tapped twice on the wooden surface of the table to get his attention. He frowned at the circular piece of furniture, they would have to move it more to the center if there would be another person sitting there. Ugh, who was he lying to? There was no 'them' in this situation, Jeong looked like he was made of cheap cardboard and Seongyeol would offer to be the table, Sehwan would have to move that shit by himself.

 

 

-Who was that?- Asked Jeong, finally looking up from the devil's device.

-Manager-ssi.- He said, then hesitated.- He called me about the new member.

-Eh?- Jeong perked up.- Did they find someone?

-Yes, he didn't say much, but the audition is on Monday.

-Can we go?

-Yes,- He peeked at the exercises, they were all written with what seemed to be a dying man's handwriting just after the aneurysm that would soon end his life.- You're very enthusiastic about this.

-And?

-Nothing,- He laughed,- I didn't expect it.

-I'll try to not get offended that you think I care so little about Golden Chance.

Sehwan tried to smile as charmingly as possible in apology. Jeong just pouted.


	3. Day and Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going a bit nuts with the images on this one, I really hope that it doesn't bother anyone too much ٩(๑`^´๑)۶  
> But moving forward, to be fair this is one big Prologue since I've planed the strory for some good twenty years in the future.... Ooops (´-﹏-`；)  
> But to be fair I really really love my world-building and it shows in all my plotlines.  
> Other than that, since music is an important element in this story, I'm trying my best to incorporate the art as best as I can, I'll be trying to write in the lyrics in a way that doesn't make you, the readers, want to claw your eyes out at my pretentious bullshit.  
> And last but not least, be warned for foul language.

The anxiety that curled viciously in Yujin's chest chose cut the access of his lungs to the rest of his body. He took a deep breath, then another, the puff of his chest smothered the ball of nerves behind his sternum.

A big, warm hand landed on his shoulder, he leaned into it.

 _"This is your heart, it's alive, it's pumping blood... And the whole wide world is listening_ "

He turned off the song, now wasn't the time to get pumped. He pressed the 'next' button.

_"And then, she asked me how we got here, I told her 'I don't know!' and if you keep on asking, I'll just keep saying so..."_

Too happy, but better.

-Yujin-ah.- Yoongi tugged gently at the chord of his earphones.

-What, is it time?!- He whisper-shouted the question, a spike of adrenaline shot straight to his chest.

-No,- Yoongi chuckled at his nervous fidgeting.- Don't get so worked up, Yujin-ah, please. Just, imagine that you're performing in front of the school it wasn't so bad then, right?

-Yes it was,- He pouted, his bodyguard looked at him with a small, lazy smile and a raised eyebrow.- And this is different.

-How so?

-I'm auditioning!- He said as if it was obvious and Yoongi was being purposely obtuse.

-And what?- His hyung reached to smooth down Yujin's blue dress shirt, he would like to say that he was wearing it because it was lucky or something. No, he was wearing the shirt because looking down at the sky blue color calmed down his nerves, even if by a fraction.

-'And what'?!- He sputtered.

_"Don't pay them any mind, you know this happens every time."_

Okay, that's it. He turned off his phone and threw his earphones on the plastic seat next to him, the plastic against plastic made a 'click-clack-click' noise in the deserted hallway. Yujin stared at the powder blue of his phone case for one second too long.

-Yes, and what?- Yoongi loosened slightly his navy blue tie (particularly blue #013060).- Just... go there, be nice and do well, that's all you need really, talent.

Yujin nodded encouraged by the sincere compliment, if Yoongi believed that he was talented then it must be true. He really was the best. Three minutes passed. The door opened, a tall businesswoman, holding a clipboard stepped out.

-Min Yujin?- She asked, Yujin nodded and stood up.- Please, you may enter.

-Good luck!- He turned around, Yoongi was waving at him with a content look on his face. Yujin smiled back. He took one last deep breath before facing the scariest situation he's ever been into.

There were too many people in the room. And they were going to record him. Heck. He mentally counted the how many were going to watch the audition, they already occupied two out of the three chairs behind the long desk tucked at one side of the room. A stern looking middle-aged man was talking quietly to the, surprisingly young, lady besides him.

His gaze followed the tall woman that had called him to the audition, only to focus on two hyungs that were sitting on a small couch against the sofa. They were staring at him intently, Yujin quickly avoided their gaze. They were whispering now, he wondered who were they and what were they doing there.

-Good morning,- They greeted. Yujin bowed deeply in return.

-Good morning.- He said steadily.

-I'm Mrs. Muk,- Presented the tall lady, Mrs. Muk,- My colleagues Mr.Bang and Mrs. Oh, as well as myself, were selected to evaluate your performance for today. You can choose to either sing a song, be it either original or previously existing, rap, or dance. Or maybe even all of the options, now could you please state your name and what are you going to show us?- The two interviewers stared intently.

It made Yujin nervous. He looked at the small camera sitting on a tripod besides the desk. The grey, glossy eye stared back.

-I, um, I'm Min Yujin, I'll perform Keye's 'As I'm Falling Down'- His mind didn't go blank under pressure, it hyper-concentrated on the task.- I'll be singing the chorus and dance the live version.

-Oh?- One of the hyungs said, Yujin couldn't help but stare, he was the pretty to the other hyung's handsome. Said handsome hyung shushed him. He probably recognized the song, not that it wasn't popular, Keye was very well known since his collab with the singer XY.

He moved towards the laptop that was place on the desk for the explicit purpose of reproducing an audio of his choice. Yujin fumbled with the small USB in his pockets. It was Yoongi's idea, a just in case that made him look prepared in front of the five people that observed his every move.

Yujin knew he'd chosen good, it was a lively pop ballad, perfectly suited for his high-pitched voice. The beat was slow which let him show off his flexibility gained from years of hard work. He made sure to look the right amount of flexible and firm. He swayed and performed complicated feet-work, his hands were boneless with each expressive caress of his face.

It was key, had said Doyeon, to show control. Yujin had listened intently. The three, Jeongja included, did their best. They said it was a promise of talent what Yujin had. A bit of a backhanded compliment but he didn't expect anything else from the capital's standards. (Jeongja pinched his cheeks so hard that day he almost lost his footing from the memory.)  He would miss the two wacky teachers, he hoped that they would meet again in the future.

_"How can I leave it? You see right through my naked eye, and we can't just waste it. Cause I wouldn't stop to wonder why, there's million reasons..."_

He sang his heart out, he honeyed his falsetto, he hit the right notes, he shoved every piece of emotion the song had evoked of flowery sunsets in the beach and rose-peach water under the sunlight. Splashes of salty seawater, cold, glistening droplets over hot, sun cream smelling skin.

_"Don't leave me as I'm falling down!"_

He finished winded, his throat hurt, Yujin didn't really sing that much, but he did have some potential. Besides, hee had to impress, so impress he did, even if it had taken him several embarrassing voice cracks and hours of singing crammed in a single week. He wasn't good, but he was better than before. Yoongi had told him that with more training he could become exceptional.

Yujin heard the two hyungs' rapid-fire whispering but he had to ignore them for now, it was the three members of the company that he had to pay attention to. Their faces were neutral, expectant. They talked on low hushed voices between them while throwing him curious looked. They weren't as low as the whispering of the other two present in the room, but low enough to be difficult to discern the words.

They went back and forth for a good minute before reaching an agreement.

-Mr. Min, please wait outside for our decision, we have to discuss in detail what we've seen.

-Yes, okay, of course,- Yujin scrammed with one last bow. The dismissal didn't mean anything bad necessarily, nor anything good per se, he kept repeating to himself.

He closed the door behind himself.

-Jinnie-ah?- Asked Yoongi, eagerness mixed with worry and fragile hope. The elder straightened in his seat.

-They told me to wait.- He said. He was sweaty, even though half a minute of dancing was as still as he got during that last week where sleep was a light substitute of the permanent death he wished for. He snapped back to the present.- They'll decide if I'm a trainee or not.

Yoongi sighed heavily through the nose, he was impatient, that gentle bodyguard of his. His phone and earphones were nowhere to be seen, probably safely tucked in Yoongi's pockets. Yujin sat down and took a deep breath, he bent forward exhaustedly.

-How did it go?- The man nudged him with his shoulder.

-I nailed the moves, but I'm not so sure about the song itself. I...- He paused, being trainee would be difficult, he just realized. It was okay though, he had a feeling in his gut.- I did well.

The repetition of his previous words seemed to please Yoongi, who hummed in contemplation. Then Yujin was being squeezed to death by Yoongi, the proud older brother, always preferable to Yoongi, the cautious bodyguard.

-Mmmmmf!- He couldn't even open his jaw against the other's strong chest.- Let go...- He gasped out.

-No, never.- They stayed like that for three whole minutes before Yujin started to protest and trash to be let go. The imaginary scenario of the tall lady opening the door to see him like this made his internal organs collapse into themselves in shame.

When he regained his freedom he quickly combed his hair and breathed some fresh air. The door opened startling him, Yujin had made himself presentable just in time.

-Mr. Min,- This time on the door was the only man in the interviewing that called him.- And mister Min,- He then addressed Yoongi, who didn't even try to correct him. The bodyguard stood up with a defeated nod of his head.

They've decided, his chest puffed up with one last deep breath. Yoongi, always behind him, put his hand on Yujin's lower back to push him forward gently. Yujin wiped his forehead as subtly as he could.

Inside the room, a strange sight greeted them. The younger of the two hyungs, with the big eyes and pretty face, was sitting cross-legged on the desk. He had tilted his head down to talk to the youngest of the three interviewers, Mrs. Oh. He smiled, she blushed, he said something, she giggled and leaned forward to rest her head on her joined hands, looking interested.

Yujin kinda wanted to giggle with her.

-Mr. Min,- Started Mrs. Muk, both her and Mr. Bang were looking over several pieces of paper.- We'll arrange a contract, for you to sign, maybe next week.

-I'm not sure I understand...- Yujin looked up startled, just realizing that Mr. Muk wasn't talking to him. He inclined his head backwards to look at his guardian's face. Yoongi looked hopeful.

-It means that we accept your son into the company,- Then she then addressed Yujin.- Congratulations, Mr. Min, you're an official trainee for Triumph Entertainment's undebuted group, Golden Chance.

Yujin hadn't smiled as wide in a long time, he felt proud of himself. It was as if Mr. Muk had bestowed him an important title.

-Thank you,- He bowed once, then twice again.- Thank you so much for the opportunity!

-It's not us you should thank,- Piped in Mrs. Oh, still from her seat in the desk, Yujin turned towards her and she winked mischievously back at him.- It's your hard work.

Feeling his ears redden from all the attention he inclined his head downwards to hide his embarrassment.

-Thank you for the kind words, Mrs. Oh.- He mumbled.

Shortly after that, the three interviewers left the room, apparently busy with other tasks inside the company. That left the two hyungs that still spoke quietly to each other. The pretty one scowled, face reddening, the handsome one laughed mockingly only to get a punch in the shoulder for his trouble.

Then they approached them.

-Mr. and Mr. Min?- Greeted the eldest for the first time.

-Oh, no, sorry for the misunderstanding, he's, uh... He's not my son.- Yoongi's hand landed solidly on Yujin's nape. It was comforting. The pretty hyung made the most skeptical face he had ever seen.

-Hmmm, noted, I'm Jeong, the lead dancer of Golden Chance.- The taller boy blinked at Yuijin but it felt more like a double wink. Two eyes, twice the power. Alas, the hollow snap of a hand against Jeong's scalp shattered the moment. His pretty head lurched forward.

-Yah! I should be the one to introduce myself first, brat.- Snapped indignantly the older, he sounded jokingly stern, more than anything.

-You were taking too long,- Said Jeong unapologetically, his eyebrows climbed up his forehead petulantly.

-You'll take too long when I finish with you.- Behind him, Yoongi chuckled, amused at the two's bickering. Then the handsome hyung turned towards them.- I am so sorry, he's very... unconventional, my name's Sehwan, and I'm the leader of Golden Chance, it's so nice to meet you Yunjinnie-ah.

Sehwan's smile made him look even more handsome. He first stretched out a hand towards Yoongi who shook the offered appendage whole-heartedly. Sehwan sent the bodyguard a mysterious smile that made the other man look away. The leader hummed contently.

-I admit, the whole process may seem rushed, however we tried our best to find the ideal person for this position, I'm so glad we did.- Said Sehwan as if it was a fact of life and not an arbitrary set of events that led Yujin exactly at this place, exactly at this specific moment. Yujin wasn't sure he understood.

Again, Yujin was thirteen and he didn't understand many, many things. So he did the next best thing.

-It's nice to meet you hyungs.- He smiled cautiously.

-Oof, you're so cute.- Long fingers clashed together in a silent slap, palm against palm.

* * *

Seongyeol looked down at the two different walls in the bedroom. Each corner, which wasn't a corner per se, but more like a little imaginary cutoff of the cramped room, reflected their inhabitant almost to perfection.

Parallel to his bunk-bed was Jeong's own. It was bare, devoid of any decoration or personalization besides a flower-patterned blanket thrown on per Sehwan's request and a pair of earphones. It reflected each of them's goals in life, if Seongyeol were to twist it into something poetic. To Jeong, this place was just a step towards 'something' infinitely better that waited patiently after years of hard work.

To Seongyeol the dorm was that 'something', he didn't dream big, a bed to him was a godsend and something to strive for. It sure beat wet concrete that smelled like garbage and piss, probably vomit and other questionables that made Seongyeol grateful for his lack of imagination.

Sehwan, to contrast them, wanted to go back to that 'something'. He'd lost that 'thing' and he wants to go back desperately. Seongyeol wondered why he didn't- no, no, scratch that, he knew exactly why he didn't. Their caring leader wanted Golden Chance just as much as he wanted that 'thing' back. It amazed Seongyeol.

Distracted from his previous train of thought, he crossed another line from his tattered notebook, bent pages and juice stains assured him that it was okay and that he could go back to it anytime to write something else. He stroked the angry line of graphite that his pencil left on the paper and it stained his finger in a soft metallic grey.

He checked his texts.

With a snort at their convo he finally caved in.

Jeong quickly changed the topic on him. Sneaky little... Now he _had_ to answer.

Feeling called out and inadequate for not hiding his feelings better, he read the last message with something akin to fondness that was so strong that it hurt. The truth was that there were days where he would actively avoid his place of work. There were days that the studio made him uncomfortable, no matter how much he'd wanted it in the first place.

It was perfect, not too big but with everything he needed to do what he loved most. It was what was inside that scared him. It felt like cheating. So he hid instead of dealing with it, worrying others in the process.

His feet were cold. So cold that when he looked at them, the small toes had gone purple from the lack of blood circulation. It was a cold November.

But he's had colder. What he didn't have was delicious leftovers just waiting for him to heat-up. Hungry without eating breakfast, Seongyeol went towards the kitchen in the fastest way possible, which meant throwing himself from the second floor of the bunk-bed. Forgoing the stairs, of course.

He hit the tiled floor with a dull thud, he hit his knee a bit too hard but his side softened the impact so it was okay.  
  
-Ow.- He was glad that no one heard.

* * *

Yujin had a week to gather his things from aunt Jiyoo's house and move to the dorm with the rest of his new teammates. Yoongi protested quite vocally at the decision of the management of the company, adamant that Yujin cohabited with three other people who were supposed to be part of the upcoming group.

His mom, just like Yoongi, wasn't thrilled either.

-Yoongi-yah, how am I supposed to agree with this?- The man sighed heavily, eyes on the blurry road. He turned on the windshield wipers that squeaked against the wet surface of the car window.

-I don't know noona, they were unwilling to compromise.

-They're suspicious that's what they are.- She scoffed thorough the Bluetooth speakers in the car.- I'm not leaving my thirteen-year-old alone, twenty-four seven, with some strange men I've never met, let alone trust.

-We met two of them, the leader, and the current maknae, he's fifteen, close to Yujin.- He piped in quietly.

-And? How was the eldest?- She asked, Yoongi hummed.

-Responsible, from what I saw,- He threw a glance at Yujin through the rear-view mirror.- Good with children. Melodramatic.

-Aha.- She didn't sound convinced.

-I mean...- Yoongi trailed of with a grimace.- We can talk it out, The CEO seemed understanding when I spoke to him.

-Well, fine, I'll arrange a video call. Bye to you two. Call you later.- She huffed, irritated at the situation.

-Bye mom!- Shouted Yujin, unable to hold back his enthusiasm.

-Bye sweety, we'll talk tonight, don't forget. I love you.- She sent him a kiss.

-Holy shit!- The car swerved brusquely off the street, Yoongi stomped on the breaks in the opposite side of the road with a rough screech of rubber against asphalt, scared out of his mind.- What the fu- Yujin, are you wearing your seatbelt?

-Yeah...- He answered, still startled from the abrupt maneuver. The protective band around his torso had restricted his chest too harshly, leaving a slight sting on the soft skin of his neck.

-Yoongi-yah, what's happening.- Asked Yijin's mom tersely.

-There's been... a car accident. Some asshole drove in the opposite side of the street, we almost head-butted, if I haven't reacted on time... - The bodyguard answered with a relieved exhale as he drove the car back on track.

-A car accident? Did someone crash?

-Yeah... There was a van behind me, looked expensive.- Said Yoongi looking backwards.

* * *

Seongyeol could only look in abject horror as Jeong burst in tears.

-Oh no, honey.- Rushed Sehwan to console the inconsolable.

- _".._. _the number of victims is unknown by emergency responders, this being the tenth road accident in November alone, the number doubling the average of the previous decade and raising exponentially the fatal victims. The Minister and Transport and Road Safety had declared the situation as a matter of public..."_

He tuned out the woman. What a cold month was the month of November.

Jeong's sobs were crushing, he has never dealt with this before. Twenty minutes later things got worse.

'Eight people killed in car cash in Nonhyeon-ro', said the red rectangle under the footage of a black van that resembled a crushed tin can more than a vehicle.

Sehwan had to take Jeong to bed, he had school tomorrow and tonight would be long. Seongyeol gleefully interrupted the reportage mid-sentence by switching the channel.

- _".._. _This is unprecedented..."_ \- Click.

- _".._. _in the oven for twenty minutes, more if..."_ \- Click.

- _".._. _You've never even met her!"_ \- Click.

- _".._. _They can't even spell 'Eric'!"_ \- Click. Crash. He winced at the sound of thin plastic against wood as he threw the remote on the worn coffee table. Seongyeol was bored, and worried.

There wouldn't be any dinner either, judging by Jeong's sobs and Sehwan's low, comforting voice through the cardboard-thin walls. His stomach rumbled, for a moment the rapper wondered if he should be there. But... what could he offer to the maknae? He wasn't like Sehwan or the rest of the people, he couldn't offer comfort that easily.

Either way, Seongyeol's muscles tensed, prepared for the last order of his brain that would make them move in the correct ways to get up his body from the couch. He hesitated. The livingroom was silent, maybe he wouldn't be wanted there, it was private moment, Seongyeol was an...

-Seong-ah.- Sehwan called as he made his way into the living-room.- Go to Jeongie.

-Um. Why?- The word 'why' implied a question, Seongyeol surpassed that concept with his tone.

-Just,- Sehwan shook his head in complete exasperation.- Just go, you garden gnome.- Sehwan trailed off to mutter under his breath in frustration. Seongyeol edged his way around the leader, afraid that the man would hit him with the spatula that sat innocently on the kitchen counter, he honestly didn't know what was scarier, Sehwan with a kitchen utensil or Sehwan barehanded.

After all, those hands could, and probably have, strangled whole cows who were still alive and fighting. Seongyeol shuddered the moment he gave back to his hyung.

He knocked. Ignoring all possible answers Seongyeol barged in anyways, knocking was just a courtesy. Right? Anyway.

The room was dark and the only thing that indicated that there was indeed a person on the bed to his left was the streetlamp that he hated with passion. The bright orange glow vaguely shaped a huddled silouette. And there lay the maknae, in all his sniffling, teary-eyed, puffy-faced, twitter-lurking glory. The rapper didn't know what to do with him or the situation in general.

-Hey kid,- He cleared his throat.

-Hyung.- He didn't know if he was being greeted, dismissed or cried to.

-Hey,- He repeated as he sat on their youngest's bed.

Jeong put the phone down to turn towards him to press his face against the older's thigh.

-I wasn't their fan for that long, but it kinda hurts you know... You don't think that I'm being stupid, right?- Jeong sniffed, he's never sounded more pitiful and it was scary.

-Jeong-ah, kid, I don't understand what's happening at all, but for what it's worth, I don't think it's stupid. Just tell me what is happening.- Yoongi pleaded, completely at loss. It didn't sound stupid to him but what did he know really.

-Seven of them died in the car accident.

-Who, Jeong-ah, who died?- Seongyeol knew who, more or less, they seemed to fall like flies these days. The Idols.

-IMU.- He said as if that made it clearer.- Sungha, Wonil, Yonseok, ΣT, 福, Kiha and Hye.- He emitted a pitiful, little cry in his thigh, Seongyeol could feel the tears soak in his sweatpants. His hand sneaked to pet soft, black locks.

-Okay, Jeong, listen-

-I know it's childish, you don't have to say it.- He interrupted with a loud inhale through the nose. Long-fingered hands came up in a futile attempt to wipe falling tears on a red face.

Sometimes, Seongyeol forgot that Jeong was fifteen, how stupid of him.

-They were people you know, just people, and they're dead and won't get to live 'cause of some drunk fucker.

-...Jeong,- Seongyeol struggled with his wording, he was helpless.- I understand how... _terrible_  this is, for you,- Seongyeol might be infinitely dumber than Sehwan and Jeong, both in academics and emotionally, but he understood that much.- And that's why I have to ask you to leave this Idol business for a while, at least until you feel better. It's hurting you, I don't like it, neither does Sehwan. Please.

-Maybe I should.- Jeong said as he hugged Seongyeol's leg tightly.- You're cold, put more clothes on, hyung.

-Yeah?- He patted the teen's exposed side twice.- You just want to suck off my body-heat like a leech.

-...

-...

They stood in comfortable silence, neither willing to break it.

-Jeong?

-Yeah?

-Hyung really wishes he could make it better.

-It's fine you already do.

-Do you think that you could go to school tomorrow?- Not that Seongyeol had any authority to give him permission to skip it.

-No, that's stupid, I don't even know them, they're just celebrities. Who cares?

-You do.- Seongyeol fired back.

-My teacher doesn't.- Jeong retorted.

-Then we'll make up something, you're sick tomorrow, barely able to stand, she won't even question it.- He said with confidence.- I'll talk with Sehwan. You'll see.

-...Okay.

-Don't doubt me.

-Fine... I feel guilty though.

-For what? You're their best student, you're not missing much.- Seongyeol shrugged.

-Yeah but- wait, how did you know that?

-What?- Dissimulation was the key to survival.

-How did you know that I'm the best student?- Jeong lifted his face from the elder's thigh, a small smug grin blossoming. Nuh-uh, Seongyeol wasn't having it.- In fact, how did you know that my teacher was a she, I didn't know that you care about that?

-Uhm, I didn't understand what you said brat, speak clearly next time. Anyway.- He stood up quickly, suddenly eager to _leave_.- I have to talk to Sehwan. Have a good night, please sleep.

Jeong's parting snort was a direct blow to his tough-boy persona.

-Fucking brat.- He muttered under his breath.

The fucking brat heard it somehow.

-Whatever, bitch-hyung.

Seongyeol was so glad that Sehwan knew good breathing exercises.

* * *

Yujin was tired, tired, tired, and his mom too, by the tone of her voice.

-Yoongi-yah, they're not giving me much to work with.

-I'm sorry, ma'am.- Quipped Yoongi, feeling smug as his previous words were being repeated back at him by the harried mother.- I wish I could've done more.

-Stop apologizing you schmoozer.- She replied in fake annoyance.

The bodyguard's lips quirked up in a smile.

They had history, Yujin's mother and Yoongi. Way, way back, even before he was born. Those were thirteen years of history and shared memories that Yujin didn't quite understand. What he did know, was that she was the one who recommended the poor, delinquent teen to the security company that protected her. And after Yujin's birth, she was the one who assigned said teen to her personal security detail.

Yujin had known Yoongi for his entire life. Yujin was also very sleepy. His eyes closed, he couldn't keep them open. The soft warmth of the couch lulled him further into sleep. The bodyguard's 'Yujin-senses' were tingling, he stopped mid-sentence.

-Kiddo go to sleep.

-Okay.

-Brush your teeth.

-Okay.

-Don't forget the alarm.

Damn it, he forgot the alarm.

-...Okay.

-That's a good boy.

-Goodnight baby.- Cooed his mom.

-Goodnight.- He padded towards his and Yoongi's room. Aunt Jiyoo didn't even think of giving the older man a separate room for himself even though there were three (3) unoccupied bedrooms that collected dust. Yujin was kinda glad he would be leaving.

-...Did I tell you how I got the hot trainee's number.

-What? No, oh my god, what did you do Yoongi-yah...- Their voices grew fainter as he went further down the hallway. Their words weren't registering at all.

* * *

Jeong was picking at an imperfection on his face absentmindedly when Sehwan flew into their living-room, half naked, with only a flimsy bathroom towel to protect the peace and wholesomeness in their humble household.

-Guys! Guys! The maknae is coming- Stop that, it's gonna get worse.- Sehwan somehow reached over to slap the offending hand on his face.- The new member is coming today, Hwang just called me, that fucking assho- He's coming in an hour. I really hope we can make him feel welcome, guys, I heard that he was shy so let's treat him well. 

After he finished gushing after their new member, Sehwan got dressed and explained in detail the new rules. Seongyeol had a new bunk-buddy and Jeong had to share his shelf in the closet, but he found himself tapping his foot in excitement.

-...And Jeong if I see the napkins anywhere in the house I swear, _I will_  scalp you.

-Bitch damn, I'm not the youngest now so you throw me under the bus like that?

-What did you call me? Show some respect, I've been taking care of you for an entire year and you treat me like this?! How could you say that to me!?- Why was Sehwan crying?

-It's an expression hyungie, I would never call you that for real- and that happened one time, could you let it go?- Oh my god please don't cry hyung- Yeongie-hyung help me. Please stop, sorry, I'm _so_  sorry! Please, I'll never ever say anything like that ever again! Please!

* * *

The door opened a bit too quickly for it to be naturally timed. Sehwan had ran towards the handle. No he didn't, the part of Yujin's mind that had faith in adults snapped back. But unless he was standing just beside the door waiting for them to ring the bell there was no way for the leader to reach the handle so fast... Right?

-Hello, hello!- Greeted said leader of the group, with a big, sparkling smile. Yujin remembered his introduction, some good two weeks ago, the man was very handsome, very mature too. He stood out, both with his beauty and his aura.

(That weird, parting wink he'd sent Yoongi would also be burned in his mind's eye permanently, he cringed as the intrusive thought squirmed itself to the foreground of his thoughts.)

-Sehwan-ssi, are you okay?- Asked Yoongi the cheerful man, alarm clear in his voice.

-Oh? What?- Yoongi gestured vaguely to his own face to indicate that Sehwan's was red and blotchy, the oldest trainee has been crying.- Ah! Don't worry, it's nothing, a silly misunderstanding, really.

-Oh,- Said Yoongi simply with an odd look on his face.

-Come on in, Yujin-ah, hon welcome,- Said Sehwan warmly. Yujing smiled at the warm feeling in his tummy. He wasn't nervous in front of Sehwan that much, the man always smiled at him.

-Hello,- He bowed to his new hyung.

-Yes, yes, hello to you too.- A giant, calloused hand ruffled his hair, the warmth against his scalp made him avoid the man's eyes. -...Um, sorry but at the moment I really don't have nothing to offer, Yoongi-ssi, Yujin-ah.- Said Sehwan, embarrassed. The leader started to wring his hands nervously at his inability to be a good host.

-It's okay,- Yoongi assured quickly, he gestured towards the bag slung over his shoulder.- I'll be busy with the luggage anyway.

-Oh, please let me help,- Said Sehwan with another weird smile. Yujin, couldn't help but notice the tan hand that had sneaked around Yoongi's forearm. Sehwan's hands, while big and calloused, were also elegant, with slender fingers. Their touch looked tender. He quickly avoided his eyes again.

He fumbled with his own fingers. They'd told them that the apartment was small, and to pack lightly since there wouldn't be much space for him. Seeing it in person was a different thing. Yoongi had a single blue duffel bag slung over his shoulder, it wasn't even full.

He took a few tentative steps inside his new home. On the ratty couch, squeezed in their small living room were seated two people, one he recognized instantly. It was glaringly obvious that beautiful Jeong didn't belong in that environment. The sleepy man besides him was unknown, however.

He bowed to them silently in greeting when they looked up from the _bizarre_  reality show they were watching. Jeong jumped immediately as if burned.

-Hellooooo!- More or less exclaimed the older boy, with a jovial squeeze to his thin shoulder- It's so nice to meet you again, Jinnie-ah!

Yujin blushed at the greeting and at the nickname.

-Hyung, hyung, come and meet him,- Jeong prodded the unknown man dozing on the couch. One of his narrow cat-like eyes opened behind a straight black lock. The man got up slowly from his seat, he had no hurry in this life.

The hyung offered Yujin a pale hand, he shook it gingerly.

-It's nice to meet you,- The hyung leaned forward as if he was telling a secret, his voice was low and gravelly, it sent a pleasant shiver down his spine.- I'm Seongyeol, I promise that I'll take care of you.

-I-it's nice to meet you too, hyung.- Stuttered Yujin.

A muffled sound, very similar to a squeal, interrupted their introductions. They turned to look at Jeong, who had covered his mouth in mortification.

-I'm sorry,- He said with a jerky flap of his hand and red cheeks, Seongyeol rolled his eyes,- It's just, you two are so cute, I want to squish you.

Seongyeol meanly pinched his side, making Jeong squeal and jerk sideways.

-Don't call me cute, don't even look at me- The eldest growled, even Yujin could hear the teasing tone behind it.

-But you are, my heart will combust,- Jeong pouted prettily.

-Die then,- Deadpanned Seongyeol with a shrug, completely unbothered. A single backwards wave dismissed him from the conversation before he finally returned to his seat.

Yujin decided that he liked him.

* * *

Seongyeol was adjusting. It took time, but he really was. It was different to have a genuine minor in the house with them. Jeong didn't count, he didn't count because he knew how to wash his clothes at the age of seven, washing machine bullshittery, ironing business and all. Jeong didn't count at all.

Yujin was soft, shy, inexperienced. It angered Seongyeol as much as it made him want to _protect_  and _nurture_. Was it a human trait? Did everyone else feel that? He might be going nuts from the neighbors upstairs' suspicious fumes. He was going to murder the dumb potheads.

What Seongyeol did know was that it wasn't part of the plan. He'd really gone off the rails with that one, straight down the drain. Destroyed by a weird country bumpkin that smiled _too much_  and a weird creature that wanted to pass off as a human child. And now this new soft baby animal that didn't talk that much and blushed every time Jeong was in the room.

He never told the two idiots anyway, they wouldn't understand. And them getting along and talking about feelings, daily group dinners and such- that wasn't supposed to happen at all. This was a stepping stone, a fucked up one, but a stepping stone nonetheless, he made that clear with Mr.CEO.

But a contract was a contract, it was seven years sacrificed just for the smallest, infinitesimal chance that he might _not_  get eaten by the bigger dogs. In the industry that is, no street dog ever tried to eat him, probably because he smelled like he had some kind of disease.

Sometimes he wondered if it was worth it. If he really wasn't just wasting his time and precious youth. But then he remembered exactly how did Mr.CEO stumble across him dressed in rags and hungry (probably starving, you didn't know hunger until you've eaten from a garbage can behind a cheap Italian restaurant).

His only hope were exactly three mix tapes hidden on his person (in his pants, but no one dared to go bellow the waist) that _if_  he sold that day, he might have gotten to eat real food tomorrow. It was sad. He didn't really expect that for himself when ~~his mother~~  and when ~~that bastard didn't...~~

Hm. He made himself sad.

-Hyungie,- The crisp- _correct_ \- accent of the maknae who wasn't the maknae anymore smacked him sharply into reality.- Hyung, please wake up, it's getting late.

-Shut up.- He ignored they younger's rising anxiety, the kid hated being late.

-You better be up and going in ten minutes before Seong-nim gets you.- The brat took the pillow to the head like a champ. -Okay, I warned you though,- God, he could feel the indifferent shrug that wasn't really indifferent because Park Jeong was and would always be a _snitch_.

Sehwan was going to whoop his skinny ass.

He got up with a last 'fuck you', Jeong was insufferable, Seongyeol wanted to punch him in his baby-cheeked face.

* * *

Everyone was nice to Yujin and he appreciated that very much.

-Yeah, it wasn't even me this time.

-You're disgusting, you're fucked do you know that? Just admit it!

-Get your shit together and stop accusing others when you loose your stuff.

-You fucking cock, you took it I know it!

-Why would I lie? I hate you, asshole!

-Then what the fuck are you doing here?

-Guys I have a headache, you better stop this right now or I _will_  tear apart something you love.

-You _might_  cause me to shed a tear.

-Jeong-ah. Don't, hon. Seongyeol-ah if I hear something like this again there will be consequences. What is this, a zoo? What kind of example are we setting here?

-...

-...

-This is very upsetting, I didn't expect it from you two of all people, please treat each other with respect...

-Khhhh sorry. hyungie.

Those hyungs were funny, Yujin hasn't heard so many cuss words since that time his mom hit her hand against the kitchen counter. He ate his breakfast silently watching the drama unfold. A second later they were at it again, Yujin didn't know the catalyst of that row, however.

-He went through my shit!

-Why the fuck would I do that? Do I sniff your notebooks or something? What sort of backwards fucking pageantry is that?

-See? He's using big words to confuse us.

-It only confuses you, though...

-Shut up.

-Yeah, ri-

-Shut. Up.

It was getting a bit tense, Yujin would be forever grateful that he's too shy to get in Sehwan's bad graces. The man was scary when mad. Yujin stopped eating, afraid that his chewing would turn all that negative attention towards him.

-This is... unbelievable.

-...

-...

-...You better be ready for class in ten minutes, we'll talk later.

* * *

Dance classes with his new band-mates wasn't that much different than normal dance classes, Yujin found. He started off giddily, eager to impress and even more eager to please. The young trainee did his best to dance as good as it was expected of him. Then even better. After all, his dancing was what got him the position in the first place.

-Okay, this looked better, one more time and then a break.

Glitter's 'What do you want my heart for?' Started again on the loudspeaker.

The slow beat that let them show off the tense choreography encouraged Yujing. He surprised himself, maybe it was his teacher, maybe it was the dedicated air in the room, but something had made him learn all the dance moves in three hours...

He observed each member. It was obvious who had skill, who was trying his hardest and who was having fun. Their personalities shined through their dance. Even Seongyeol, whose sluggish aura gave the impression of someone who wouldn't hesitate to slack off, had a patient eye for detail that translated clearly onto his movements, crisp and organized.

He watched Jeong's reflection in the mirror that occupied the entire wall in front of him. Yujin began to copy the older teen's polished confident moves much clearer to him than their instructor's. Foot back, arm up, head tilt, head tilt, head tilt. Before he realized, he'd lost himself in the music, and shortly after that, the class had ended.

Tired and sweaty, he gathered his stuff amidst tense silence to go to their English class.

Yujin understood why Sehwan's dancing was always so forceful, leading, solid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you still reading this? (⊙ω⊙)！


	4. Morning, Evening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeongie and Sehwanie's point of view, following a brief time-skip. A minor character (soon to be major) appears again, we mention a mysterious figure ٩(◕‿◕｡)۶, and we introduce someone new 👀👀

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mmmmmmmm, things are picking up (in the next chapter) ╮(￣ω￣;)╭ .

Normally a shower made everything better, Jeong’s tired body would soak under the warm (lukewarm) water to relax his sore muscles (now with a Yujin to compete with for Seongyeol’ s peach-scented shampoo, since only one person could use that before the trash goblin found too much was missing- ...anyway). This time he was just wet and pissy, to worsen his mood, Sehwan’s pout, just like a child’s, grated on his nerves immeasurably.

He wanted to watch some K-Drama, man... Pff, whatever, if Sehwan wanted to scold them for arguing then he would take it in stride. Fighting with Seongyeol was pleasant after all.

-Are you guys taking this seriously?- No one answered to Sehwan’s squawking.- Seriously, why are any of you here? We look like we’re here just for fun, always messing around, what are our motivations here? Goals? Do we have those!?

No one answered, Jeong’s gaze roamed around the room, Yujin didn’t raise his head and Seongyeol seemed a thousand miles away. They didn’t answer again, Sehwan’s already hysterical demeanor snapped, raising Jeong’s metaphorical hackles at the eldest’s body language and obnoxious tone. The leader was defined by serenity and a cool mind, a tranquil undertone of their erratic melody, be it Seongyeol’s sharp crescendos of violence and foul language or Yujin’s new erratic murmuring, like the low _staccato_  of a group of violins, all nervous but steady.

Sehwan was the mediator, focused and stubborn. He’s seen him battling unshakably a hoard of stressed staff and impertinent managers, hell, Jeong’s even seen the eldest argue directly with Mr.CEO himself. This wasn’t it, his fight with Seongyeol wasn’t the cause of the erratic reprimand.

-Okay, you- He pointed uncharacteristically harsh at the maknae with his pointer finger.- Why did you come here? A dream of yours? A whim?

Put on the spot, Yujin shrank in his seat looking small and uncomfortable. Jeong could feel the violins slow down to nothing, feeling hurt on the maknae’s behalf. This wasn’t it, but he couldn’t fight the eldest hyung either.

-Oh come on that’s fucked, stop it.- Intervened Seongyeol with a frown, barely controlled and fighting against a more natural reaction. Jeong was glad he opened his big mouth since he himself wouldn’t be able to do it.- Put that finger down, you’re not sending anyone to their execution.

-Why are _you_  here then?- Sehwan rounded on his dongsaeng like a rabid animal, fed on the minimum scraps. It probably had rabies.- You love music, you have talent and what? Tell me more, what are your motivations, Seonyeol-ah, your hopes and dreams.- He added the last part with a slight hint of irony.- I know that you didn’t come for fun.

-I came here to make money.- The rapper proclaimed clearly, voice loud and self-assured.- Mr.CEO offered a good contract and I had to accept... I’m in a really great place now and I’ll be even better in the future.

He paused for a second to collect his thoughts while looking away from Sehwan’s attentive gaze.

-I’m taking it all step by step… good things will come.- He sounded hopeful.

Sehwan stared at his calm expression unabashedly, he probably saw something in Seongyeol’s chatoyant eyes that told him more than his mouth could.

-I’m _struggling_...- The leader emphasized the word involuntarily.- To see a future for us. For all I know, we could be wasting our precious time, you could be wasting something very important. As the leader I really can’t afford that, we need to have plans. So...

Then the eldest’s gaze turned towards him.

-You Jeong?- Sehwan never called him ‘just-Jeong’ there were only two people who used ‘just-Jeong’, it sent an uncomfortable shiver down his spine. The tall country boy looked serene though, as if appeased by Seongyeol’s previous utilitarian answer.

 

Jeong couldn’t answer. He really couldn’t. Not when the only thing he could come up with was ‘because I wanted to do leave that nightmare of a house’ or ‘I wanted to make friends for once’. Every single reason of his seemed frivolous, Jeong felt ashamed. His face heated up at Sehwan’s expectant expression. All their curiosity piled on top of him.

-I don’t know,- He gave up looking down at his lap to hide his tearing eyes. His voice was just a whisper, just so he could preserve a bit of dignity if his voice wavered.- I went to the auditions and they accepted me.

-Well, I came here just to defy my elders. Twenty-year-old me thought that grandma was getting too much of a say in my life.- Sehwan confessed, looking anything but happy with himself. Jeong’s never seen the leader look so self-deprecating. At the firm statement, his thoughts went all ‘???’.

Still glass-eyed enough to want to keep his eyes cast down, Jeong perked up slightly at the personal revelation, he could even see Seongyeol lean forwards in curiosity. Yujin sniffled quietly. He wasn’t crying (he hoped) but the severe tone of the eldest had shaken him something terrible. Poor softie. Not that Jeong could talk to be honest, he was the same.

The thing was that Sehwan never shared personal details. Never. No names, no places no distant anecdotes. Jeong suspected that he was hiding something, he hadn’t suspected for that something to be pure shame.

The two of them, Seongyeol and Jeong that is, knew nothing about Sehwan’s life ‘before Golden Chance’. It didn’t really matter per se, Sehwan’s past wasn’t instrumental in their perception of him, they didn’t need to know, but they wanted to, as hypocritical as it was.

After all, the country boy was supposed to have a _normal’_  family with parents and cute little cousins. Hell, maybe even a couple of dogs and a chicken that no one wanted to kill for Christmas because it was too cute following family members around with a soft 'coo-co-co'.

They got nothing of course, that set a quiet, but dangerous fire known as curiosity. The most they knew was that:

  1. He used to live in deeply rural village by the coasts, miraculously untouched by the closest sprawling Metropolis.
  2. He had a big family, a know-your-third-cousin-once-removed, type of big.
  3. ...He liked farming (?)
  4. ??? ...Cows.



That was it. To know that there was a grandmother figure involved felt like a bit step forward.

Most of the time, Seongyeol and him ran their imagination wild, everything went, from mafia sons to rich exiled chaebols… Well most of those ideas came from Jeong’s love for the dramatic and such common tropes, but Seongyeol always looked amused so it was a win anyway.  

It was the rapper himself who decided to say something. Not exactly to break the ice, but more as an expected question, a social prompt if you will. Seongyeol was the only one brave enough to ask it out of all of them though.

-You have a grandmother?- He asked with raised eyebrows, his voice didn’t sound quite right. Like he ate a lemon and the juice irritated his voice. Goof.

-Yes?... Who doesn’t?- Answered Sehwan looking on in confusion. His hands came to rest on his narrow waist.

-We didn’t know.- The rapper sounded neutral, but he wasn’t fooling anyone, much less Jeong, he knew exactly what the elder teen was thinking- feeling to be more specific. Curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back (and other popular proverbs cut in half by the conformist society.)

-How cou- I love my grandma! I must have told you about her sometime- His voice cut off, marking the precise moment in which Sehwan remembered exactly what has been happening for the last year (and two months, three days! He’s been counting.)

-...

-...

Sniffle.

-...Oh.

-...Yeah.

-...I’m sorry.- Sehwan, looked stressed.

-You shouldn’t, never- Assured Seongyeol because Sehwan wasn’t the _only one with secrets_. No one talked and no one asked in this house.

-I though,- Sehwan sighed worriedly,- That we should talk about this... about us. Rules, real stuff, things aren’t going so good in TE (Triumph Entertainment.).

Sehwan seemed to age before them, the tall man tugged his black hair backwards with sun- tanned hands. A stray thought assured Jeong that green eye-contacts would look superb with the eldest’s sculpted features, flew around his head and tickled his nose. He swatted at it, annoyed. Metaphorically of course. That said, he noticed Sehwan’s masterful play on emotions and the sub-sequential distraction from the topic of his personal life.

The leader sat down with a huff besides Yujin who flinched slightly. More than a flinch it looked like his small body moved with the help of gravity towards the giant, Sehwan-shaped indent on the couch. Sehwan, however, noticed the small ‘eep’ of agitation, judging by his guilty frown. He gave the maknae a sideways hug with one heavy arm.

-I’m so sorry baby, I didn’t mean to bully you like this.- Yujin nodded, a bit uncomfortable with the entire room’s attention on him.- Do you forgive hyung?

Yujin nodded again. Sehwan smiled at him with a whispered ‘okay’ and squeezed warmly the tiny shoulders with his broad palms. It warmed Jeong’s heart, even the cottony feeling in his mouth from crying disappeared. The interaction probably even cleared his pores.

-Just tell us what’s going on.- Seongyeol demanded, impatient, irritating, insufferable.

Whatever light seemed to have entered the eldest’s eyes while interacting with Yujin seemed to vanish. Jeong ignored the slight pang of resentment he felt towards the rapper and his callous demeanor.

-Well, Seongyeol- _ah_ \- The second oldest bowed his head, reprimanded for the disrespect.- It’s something that has been on my mind for a long time, but I never got to share because there seems to be some problem between you two.- He eyed both of them, you avoided being in the same room, now I know why.

Jeong crossed his arms defiantly.

-But I’m not going to pressure you to talk about it, you’ll do it on your own terms…- He eyed Seongyeol who looked disgusted with life, Jeong was just relieved that it wasn’t him under the disappointed glare.- Like the emotionally mature people you are.

The glare Seongyeol sent to the room made him want to break down and cry, (Jeong knew for a fact that if that glare was sent towards anything else besides their scratched floor, Seongyeol might have ended homeless again by Sehwan’s hand), the entire situation had put him on edge that morning.

Confrontation wasn’t his thing, for most of his life he was being ignored at best so he never learned how to resolve these kinds of issues. And that was something important, Seongyeol was important, a precious person. He couldn’t leave it like that to fester and poison even if he was mad.

God, it’s been just a day, and he already missed his hyung. He missed his witty remarks and funny jokes that _always_  made him smile. That was his older brother right there, the one he hurt... Sehwan was right, he _had_  to apologise, he was ruining everything.

Yujin sniffed again. Jeong had had enough, there was only so much he could take of small baby animals being hurt. The dynamic between Yujin and him became clear enough after two days of coexistence, Jeong protected, Yujin thrived. Anything else was unacceptable.

-Jinnie-ah, please stop being sad, hyung is getting upset too,- He tugged the shy kid’s sleeve, he was too mushy on him.

Yujin’s face come from it’s hiding place behind a pillow. His cheeks were so chubby, Jeong wanted to eat him up and kiss his button nose like there was no tomorrow. It was kinda becoming a problem. Those feelings were reserved for cute kittens and cute kittens only normally.

The tentative smile he received was so worth it though.

* * *

-Okay enough beating around the bush. If we want to do this, we have to take it seriously, we _have_  to work hard.- Sehwan put as much authority as he could in his voice.- If we win, we can’t go back to the beginning, if we lose, we may never go forward again… So to speak.

-Then what? We should… ‘work hard’? ‘Work like a team’, ‘give it our all’?- Asked Jeong with a flippant, if very defiant gesture of his hands.

-We ‘should’? No honey, we _have_  to do all this. Imagine us in five-seven years, how many awards we may get until then, the concerts, the tours, the fame, the fans? The money? It sounds good doesn’t it. Almost sweet.- He rubbed his fingers and their eyes glinted with something ambitious. Sehwan let himself dream just for a moment.

-It sounds very nice the way you put it.- Confessed Seongyeo, he sounded sceptical. One day Sehwan was telling him to not get his hopes up too much the next he was confessing his visions of grandeur. He beamed at the rapper.

-Oh Yeongie-yah, imagine, everyone would buy your albums. No one would ever want to steal your music, they’re going to appreciate your talent for what it is.- Sehwan’s fist clenched as he tried to control the volume of his voice. He’s used to shout when emotional.

-...Do you.. really believe that?- Asked the rapper with something vulnerable and very, very tender in his voice. Ah, that sweet thug of his.

-Yes.- He nodded with conviction, Sehwan’s seen his dongsaeng’s talent first hand. The moment the other touched the piano keys felt like a jolt of electricity down his entire body, the music was sincere and raw, always succeeding to evoke deep emotions out of him that he didn’t know he could feel.

Through the rappers’ music Sehwan got to know himself and discover parts of himself previously unknown, in fact, his latest epiphany was accompanied by the lulling ta-ta-ta-ta-ta … ta-ta-ta-ta of the piano keys. Seongyeol knew exactly what he was doing.

Sehwan would do anything in his power to bring that talent to the world, or he would die otherwise.

But at the moment the young teen looked on the verge of crying.

-But…- He stared in the eyes of each and every one of them. He liked what he saw, it made him giddy.- I won’t be having any slackers. Understood?

-I’ll work hard,- Yujin’s quiet voice made itself known, not breaking, but leaving a dent in the soft atmosphere.- I… don’t know my part here yet, but I’ll give all my talent to help, my hyungs have big dreams after all.

His smile was sweet and boyish and charming, leaving Sehwan speechless. Yujin was a charmer. Every day he learned more about the type of person their maknae was in the most unexpected ways. Sehwan liked that new person’s nuances, even if they were hidden behind Yujin’s quiet shyness, he couldn’t wait to see him grow up.

-This is the most I’ve heard you speak at once Jinnie-yah.- Teased Jeong with a smile. It was a curious

This is the most Sehwan’s heard- y-yeah. Jeong said it. Their youngest blushed, fiddling shyly with the cushion he’d been strangling the life out of during their whole talk.

-Well, now that we’re,- Jeong gestured weirdly.- ‘Looking forward’, I want to say I really want to succeed guys, I really,- Sehwan saw Jeong hesitate.- I really don’t have any dreams, I hate school and even though I get good grades, I hate studying, I really do. So there won’t be a SKY university waiting for me when I graduate... What I’m trying to say is that, at this moment… Park Jeong doesn’t have a purpose in life.-

The kid blinked harshly and Sehwan wanted nothing more than tell him that…

-That you don’t have dream,- Seongyeol had a slight lisp in his ‘sh’s’ and ‘s’s’ as he talked, Sehwan felt fond at the way his brow scrunched in sympathy, because the rapper was kind, behind the prickly exterior.- That’s fine, you are the type of person that could become anything they want in life, Jeong-ah.

-Thank you for the compliment.- Smiled the younger, he looked delightfully surprised and Sehwan felt all the stress that weighed on his shoulders during weeks disappear.- I really want to become successful, but I’m very scared. Please, let’s do it together.

* * *

To be fair, Sehwan might have, perhaps, maybe, probably projected his own insecurities in a sort of explosive anger that left everyone questioning their life choices. He thought it was good since some self-reflection was crucial in moments like this. He could feel it in his stomach, there was something big going on.

He shook the uneasiness, this was exactly what he was dreaming about all those years, Woosung will eat his words. (He couldn’t believe that he was mentally discussing with a sixteen-year-old.)

His phone gave two small ‘pings’. A single message from Mr.CEO delimited his entire Tuesdays’ schedule.

 

 

Mr.CEO tended to remind Sehwan in subtle ways of the amount of trust he put onto him as the leader of Golden Chance. It did feel like an enormous responsibility, it really did, both for himself and for his band mates. He remembered feeling borderline astonished at Mr.CEO’s choice to make _him_ , a country bumpkin, dialect yapping, youngster the leader of the only lifeline of his company…

* * *

Seongyeol entered their shared bedroom skittishly, like a guilty rat that got trapped in the rice sack and had to wait a long time for the unsuspecting housewife to free him. He stood in front of Jeong for a good minute fidgeting with his long fingers. Then he sneered.

-All right, you fucking mutant.- Jeong snorted, he wasn’t in the mood for another row with his hyung.

-What, you reprobate.- He tossed his Korean homework aside, but his notebook fell on the floor bending the pages, he hurried to pick it up quickly ‘cause them books costed more than their rent for a year.

-Aaah, this has to stop.- Seongyeol closed his eyes and tilted his head backwards.

-...Okay.- What the fuck was he talking about?

-...

-And?- Prompted Jeong.

-Don’t push it,- The hyung snapped, embarrassed (haha) then looked straight into his eyes with pure sincerity and a low sigh.- What I came here for was to say that… I’m sorry, it was really douchy on my side to accuse you like that, you’re my dongsaeng and you didn’t deserve it at all… Especially since I didn’t have any proof,- He smacked his lips and bowed his head- Hyung is sorry.

Seongyeol looked guilty and regretful, what was Jeong going to do? Deny his apology? He wasn’t exactly mad at his hyung, just hurt and a bit sad.

Jeong hugged him without further ado, tired and sad from the entire ordeal. He hated fighting with his close ones, this entire _petty_  debacle was killing him and he itched to make things right. They were more important than his pride, if Seongyeol hadn’t come to apologize, Jeong would gladly bow in apology and confess his guilt, even if he hadn’t touched a single foreign possession in the apartment.

-I’m sorry too, I was really hurt that you didn’t believe me hyung, I would never touch your stuff I swear.- He buried his face in Seongyeol’s neck, he smelled like peaches.- I really didn’t mean to be so rude to you, I’m sorry.

-Ah, that’s fine.- A fond hand came down his back, Jeong hugged Seongyeol tighter, happy with the physical contact and delirious with forgiveness.- It’s all right, we’re fine now, I wasn’t mad for that, but the notebook was important to me- ...are you crying? Oh my god, don’t cry Sehwan-hyung will murder me.

-I’m sorry,- He hiccuped suddenly.- I had such a bad time, can we not fight ever again? Please? You're my hyung... 

-Okay, okay geez kid, come here,- Seongyeol carefully peeled of the younger from his (now wet) neck.- You really can’t catch a break, huh? All right. Shh.

Seongyeol reached towards his face with his sleeve, carefully wiping the stray tears that trailed down Jeong’s cheeks.

-There you go- He cupped the boy’s red face with two broad palms.- ...Jeong-ah is always so handsome, why is he crying now? That’s so not cool.

Said handsome boy smiled shyly, cheeks pink, the hyung wasn’t a person that said things like that, the complements did wonders to his ego. Acknowledgement felt good.

-You’re flattering me too much.

-Yeah… don’t get used to it.

-...That’s fair.- He hugged his hyung again, just because he could. Suddenly, an unexpected ‘I love you’ was on the tip of his tongue, it caught him off guard. He froze, wondering if he should continue with the embrace or run for the hills before he embarrassed himself. No one ever said ‘I love you’ back.

* * *

Sehwan stared at the blank page in front of him, what he was doing at the moment would be considered a time-capsule in the future. He penned the first letter.

“ _Dear_ Seongyeol _,- He muttered under his breath.- Twenty-eighth November 2018…_ ”

He wrote the next four letters, a small soft flower in his chest bloomed into hope inside his chest. It was good, that hope, he didn’t think it was possible in this day and age. Hope sounded too poetic.

Sehwan expressed his worries, his joys and his regrets on the cheap paper. The leader hoped that one day in some ten-years’ time his words of love would give the people they were addressed to some courage.

He honestly did.

* * *

Because Jeong had no self control, even though he was banned from social media (for his own safety he had to add), he made himself an Instagram. Just to gain some ten or so followers who listened to his bullshit. All illegal of course. His contract prohibited the unauthorized social media accounts _explicitly_. If he had any regrets for doing this, they would revolve around the trust Seongyeol put in him to take care of himself. 

Well, he was taking care. His grief over his Idols was still there and may never leave, but lately he was feeling better.

 

 

He was having fun, tacky stickers and all. Yeah...

 

Tripping on thin air (a long ass leg) wasn’t the plan though. His palms automatically shot forward to break his fall. He hissed in pain as his knee also managed to absorb the brunt of the impact.

-Oh, god, are you okay?- A meek but worried voice hovered over Jeong as he slowly incorporated himself in a sitting position while trying not to cry from the pain.

Jeong stared at his palms before looking around for his fallen phone. That shit was expensive. His hands were bleeding, he noted. The rough asphalt had torn the skin of his palms layer after layer, exposing the ‘wet’ part that stung in open air. He could feel the microbes festering in his wounds.

-Oh, no, I’m so sorry Jeong-ah. Please, let me help you.- A figure crouched beside him, his nervous hands fluttered over Jeong’s fallen form, an old lady stared disgruntled at the spectacle in the middle of the street. Probably. He didn’t look at her face.

Yeah, Jeong wasn’t writing shit in school today, a single bead of blood rolled lazily down his palm. Finally, damage inspected and phone located, he lifted his head to greet Minjoon.

-Yeah it’s me.- He looked up at him.- Hi hyung.

-Hello, Jung-ah.- The taller replied, his voice concealed by a face-mask, the black cloth had small strawberries drawn on it in polka dot patterns, cute.

-Um, long time no see.- Two weeks, half a month… And two days, but who counted?

-I’m sorry, we keep meeting each other like this, you must think I’m a menace.- His brows were furrowed in honest regret. Just for that Jeong decided to forgive him completely.

-It’s fine, it was an accident.- Already having brushed off the whole incident behind him. Minjoon wasn’t the type of person to trip people on purpose.

-I’m really sorry, I should have been more careful,- Jeong’s glare made Minjoon swallow his apologies in fear.- I-I’ll help you clean up, oh my! This must hurt like hell.

-Hyung just take my phone and backpack and come to the bathroom with me,- He tossed his head towards the cafe behind them. The elder complied without hesitance and followed Jeong inside the cafe obediently.

Inside they asked for the bathroom and a first-aid kit as politely as possible while not paying for any services. Well, he asked, Minjoon stood behind him like a weird bodyguard as he held his hands in the air like a dumbass so the tender skin wouldn’t brush against something.

While Minjoon fussed as quickly as he could over his dirty palms, Jeong made up his mind about something he was 96% sure he would regret immensely.

* * *

 

He laughed under his breath at the random netizen’s comment. He wasn’t judging- he was _sure_  that that person was having a bad day. It gave him something to distract himself with from what he was going to do this Thursday. Why Thursday? Because Friday seemed too far and Tuesday seemed far too soon and he was scared.

 

* * *

Heh, 'dude'. He was glad that Minwoo wasn't big on intergenerational respect, the seventeen-year-old was the farthest thing from 'dude' to Jeong. The truth was that they weren't _that_ close, first of all Minwoo was older than him, two classes above leaving them with slightly conflicting schedules. Second of all, they've known each other for a bit less than a year...

Maybe Jeong was projecting, after all, Minwoo was his first friend ever, besides Sehwan and Seongyeol. And friendship meant a lot to him, maybe he was exaggerating his feelings maybe... He just- he hoped that his gamble wouldn't end up badly. God, he hoped. 

Thursday had never seen so close yet so far. He wasn't loosing his nerve, _he wasn't._

He hesitated though, maybe he should try to talk with Sehwan once more, maybe this time they wouldn't get interrupted. ~~(Maybe the eldest could make him reconsider)~~. The leader was a few steps further into the kitchen, barely hidden behind the wall seen from Jeong's perch on the couch, he seemed impossibly far away washing the cooking board. Jeong didn't get up to talk, the interruption a mere week ago destroyed all initiative he could've taken to start a conversation. He was scared.

'White cat, Black moggy' played in the background, shitty Korean subtitles over deep Russian dialect blinked in different colors in the dark room. He felt nervous all of a sudden. Looking to his side, he saw that Seongyeol had fallen asleep with a facemask on, tired from a hard day of vocal lessons.

The rapper wasn't a fan, but the company kept pushing, they wanted for his hyung to take on a double role as a main (and only) rapper and as sub vocalist to give more appeal to his image (improbable. Seongyeol was a musician first, singer second.

Jeong didn't talk to him either, and Yujin was ten or something, his bedtime was two hours ago. He stayed silent.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please bear in mind that I'm just one person so any mistakes are on me, this is the first story I've ever written, so this is an entirely learning process where I hope to see my progress in story-telling and writing in general.

Maths at school were hard, but the maths Sehwan taught were harder, Yujin chewed at the end of his pencil thoughtfully. The funny thing is, an entire week had passed at the blink of an eye for him and he didn't even notice. Before, at Aunt Jiyoo's time crawled by, slowed by homesickness and boredom. The time he spent in the paintress' house felt much longer than a week.

The stagnating air was barely alleviated by Yoongi's patient goofiness and his mother's recounts of the day. Mostly he was busy, he had to do things, either classes or just plain socializing, something he was never good at but was expected of him. It tired Yujin, on a mental level more than anything. He had to dance, he had to sing, he had to talk to managers and try to live together with three other guys, he had to maintain a relationship with his mother and his older brother in all but blood who were far away from him.

He had duties, and he had committed. This wasn't just on him, he had to perform for a public and he had to learn to entertain for a public. He was in a team where everyone did their part towards the same goal.

Yujin resumed the math problem, a bit more difficult than usual, but still synchronized with the unit his new teacher had started three days before he joined the class. He certainly didn't know how many favors his mother had to call in to enroll him so quickly after the whole fiasco with the second moving. He had no idea, he really didn't.

Most of the time, he thought about Joontae, missing his big grin and the way he always wanted to be paired with him at school team project no matter what. The older boy was far and while they did talk once a conversation through it wasn't the same. It wasn't the same. He didn't particularly like his new life, accepting to do the audition was a desperate attempt to find something he could like about the city, but he wasn't seeing any results.

The men he lived with were complete strangers, no matter how nice they tried to be and how much they wanted to be his friends. Yujin couldn't help but see Sehwan and Seongyeol as unknown adults that were supposed to be his caretakers instead of his mother and Yoongi. Seongyeol may have promised to take care of him two weeks ago but that wouldn't make him happy. He was homesick more often than not, missing his family and desperately wishing to come back.

He wondered what his bodyguard-slash-teddy-bear was doing- not in that particular moment, of course, right now he was probably watching his favorite K-drama,-no, right now as in, where did he live? Because his aunt was reluctant to let him, her own nephew, live with her, let alone his strange bodyguard. Did he eat well? He sighed, completely forgetting about homework and school and- and other stupid things. They were stupid, he didn't care. He psyched himself to ask Sehwan to end the tutoring session.

-Um... Hyung.- Yujin hated to interrupt.

The kind tutor paused in his detailed explanation of a complicated problem to Jeong.

-Yujin-ah?

\- ...I have to phone my mom.

-Ah, okay, the bedroom is free, Seongie-ah is in his studio until late... again.- He gave permission with an exasperated blink of his eyes. (He had the uncanny ability to make everything look exasperated.)

Yujin left the kitchen quickly and took out his phone from the second drawer of the small bedside table, the one he shared with Sehwan and Jeong. The phone rang twice and his mom's face appeared on the screen as he sat on his bed, the bottom of the bunkbed he shared with Seongyeol. Everything was shared nowadays he lamented briefly.

-Yujin, baby- She squealed, he cheer was somehow forced.- How's it going!

-Fine, it hasn't changed since yesterday at the same time.- Yujin mumbled.

-Don't give me that sass!

He stuck his tongue out at her.

-But really, how are things? Are you happy? Oh my God, they are bullying you aren't they? I knew it, those good for nothing...! Don't worry baby boy, mom will take care of things immediately, I'm calling Yoongi-ah to pick you up right now.

-Mom, no.- He jumped to clarify things before the situation escalated dramatically.- Stop, they're really nice to me and they take care. Stop, I don't even know how you could...- He blinked harshly at her belligerent posture.- ...get to this conclusion, just stop. I really don't want problems with anyone.

She relaxed in her seat, looking guilty. Then she sighed heavily, confusing Yujin.

-I'm sorry,- She closed her eyes.- I suppose that I feel guilty.

-Why? What happened?- He watched as the woman who gave him everything licked her chapped lips. The clock hung on the kitchen wall back home ticked unnaturally loud through the speakers of the phone, they shouldn't be heard at all.

She was wearing a pair of earrings that had blue stones on them and they glittered under the white light through the phone screen. It looked like nothing had changed at all from the two-and-a-half weeks he was gone.

-I feel horrible for letting go of you like that, I don't think you can quite understand.- I don't want you to live so far away with complete strangers, I worry everyday because I'm simply not there. You had your friends back here, in a good school, with me, now you're alone. Far away and I feel like I'm abandoning you, and I can't do that, not as your mother.

-But mom, I'm fine here... I was sad because I had to leave Taetae, but then I made new friends. I told you about Jeong-hyung, school is... school. It's okay, I try to talk to others.

-I'm sure you do.- His mother sounded proud so he couldn't help but preen. She nodded absentmindedly while leaning backwards in her seat. Yujin stared at her, she hadn't changed much from two weeks ago either. He could even feel her warm embrace and the small sobs that shook her thin body when he left. His mother was made of steel, he appreciated, but over that was another thin layer. He could sing endless praises for her, but he didn't. Yujin lived in this lonely bubble of his and she was one of the two people that cared to get in. He still couldn't speak to her and tell her all the things she deserved to be told. (You're beautiful, radiant, I love you, thank you, I know how much you suffer because of me.)

-But I can't help but feel like I've failed as a parent. Hell, I already failed and I can't forgive myself.- She looked straight at him a hand came up to rub at her raised eyebrows and slightly wrinkled forehead.- I hope you understand why I'm asking for forgiveness, because you don't deserve this baby.- It's what she did sometimes, she'd start to talk to him like an adult because she knew that he would understand and he needed to be told what she was telling him. Yujin liked that very much, he felt closer to her like that, she was a friend too, even though she couldn't afford to act like it very often.

-Well, that's not your fault,- He pouted helplessly, words escaped him, he wasn't eloquent.- You're the best mom. I'll love you forever you know?- It felt like pulling teeth to say that to her face to face. Other people didn't have it so hard to say their moms they loved them right?

-Yes, I know.

She smiled, he didn't remember her having such pronounced crowfeet. Then the minuscule smile fizzled out. Did she notice his reluctance?

-And,- She continued,- There's this... whole thing with the boy-band and, Yujin-ah,- She leaned forward towards the phone camera, probably perched against a fruit bowl.- you know that I don't care about what you study or what you'll do in the future, but are you one-hundred sure that percent you wanted me to sign the contract? You have to be happy.

-Yes.- He nodded at the phone in his lap, his hands tired from holding the device up in the air. But he didn't know, not really. He was waiting to see how things developed If he liked this. It happened the same with dancing, he started because it sounded fun, and now it's his passion.

-Then,- She looked down in thought.- Do your best, don't half-ass it, my son doesn't do things half-way through.

She didn't need to say it out-loud.

Seongyeol entered his studio with a tortured kind of expectance. As if he had to fight a deadly animal inside the small room, but no, there was no evil beast inside. Just bad memories and a trigger. The secretary of the company greeted him amicably on his way there, he was kind of scared to admit to himself that he knew she had a crush on him since they met. Nothing would come out of it.

She was pretty though, kind eyes and a small mouth, perfect for kisses, perhaps. White teeth, soft hair, petite figure. Her name was Hwasa, and she was two years older than him. He would never speak to her and she would never dare to start a conversation with him outside the polite bare minimum. But she stared when he didn't look and he stared back when she didn't look.

He entered the studio quickly as if ripping a bandaid. The sticky, tan strips barely stung in the end, but the sight that greeted him was like a punch to the gut with a knuckle duster. He knew how those felt.

The Minazuki piano stood in the corner as ever. He didn't have anything against the instrument, not really, versatile in it's uses with pleasant sounds, the piano was the perfect traditional medium to go over the synthetic beats that never agreed with him completely. (And he reached a compromise after a heated debate with Dong PD-nim, it was the piano or nothing, sadly.) His problem came with the type of instrument he wanted in his tracks. It wasn't a piano, and with the absence came painful and not-so-painful memories. It was a subtle masochism on his side.

He stroked the white key, the plastic was a bit dusty since a week ago when he touched it for the last time. All the dust taken care of, he got to work. He worked and worked and worked, only stopping twice for a bathroom break and a short lunch where he stuffed his mouth with rice and delicious chicken. It was so good... Sehwan was a sent from heaven and a proof that there was a God and He was Good. To be dramatic.

The clock on his computer showed that it was past midnight. Way, way past the time he'd promised to come back home. 04:43, haha, Sehwan would murder him in his sleep. Seongyeol wondered if he could bribe the leader with a trip to some pet store or something, in exchange for his forgiveness. It was easy to please their eldest, anything cute would do.

He pressed the 'back' key to repeat two pixels of audio displayed on his painfully bright screen repeatedly. With an exceptional force of will, he gathered his things and leave the studio. His steps echoed in the dark hallway, his boots sounded pleasantly against the tile, Seongyeol stared at his feet and the playing shadows he created with the hallway lights. When he reached the lobby, Hwasa was long gone and the lights in the entire plant were turned off.

Like a child, he felt a pleasant shiver of fear down his spine at the creepy atmosphere, like a scary movie. Subconsciously he knew that there was more staff in the building, probably praying for the sweet release of death as they hunched over some stacks of paperwork or whatnot, but the little sounds of footsteps and distracted conversations in the offices above him only magnified the thrill. He stopped to enjoy the silence interrupted by small noises, if he psyched himself enough, he could imagine something in the room with him. Scary. Spooky.

He took off before anyone could see the weirdo standing by himself in the dark.

The walk home was fresh and tinted with smoke and the smell of food cooking, he even overheard a fight of a mother with her teenage daughter. That felt alive, constantly moving, a true city. Everything his little slums in Wonju weren't, even though the number of stray cats was the same. Seongyeol's feet were humid and freezing by the time he reached his block and constant shadows played with his imagination at the corner of his eyes.

Yujin got home happy and satisfied with the day's work, finishing two tracks was no joke and he wasn't even tooting his own horn. Feeling only a bit miffed at the disgusting, orange streetlamp that reflected on his door keys' shiny metal he climbed the stairs and entered their small apartment. The neighbour upstairs was having another loud fight with his girlfriend (or maybe sister (???)), he tried not to listen in, it was annoying.

It was cold and dark inside and he heard Sehwan snore all the way from the entrance, but he didn't care because he got a roof above his head with a warm bed and very good company. (Even if that company was supposed to be temporary.). Sometimes Seongyeol still stopped and wondered at the luck he had, his life wasn't supposed to be like that.

Passing through the kitchen he saw the Tupper on the marble counter with a piece of paper on top.

'Seongie-ah those are the dinner left-overs please eat them if you're hungry!!

-Love, hyung ♡'

He smiled like a dumbass at the re-used notebook page and took the thing to store it... in his notebook. The one that was missing and disappeared two days ago. Mood dampened, he shoved the note in his pocket resolute to start another recompilation of his precious friendship. Even though he wasn't supposed to stay for too long, the obnoxious man fit right in his lonely life.

He returned the food in the fridge (Andong-jjimdak, chicken), and went to sleep.

Someone (a deadman) shook him awake three hours later.

-Hyung.- There were two people in this apartment that could call him hyung, he could murder brutally only one. He had to thread carefully.- Hyung, Sehwan-hyung is making breakfast please, wake up or we'll be late.

The mention of food kick-started his upper brain functions and that included voice recognition. He stretched his hand towards the space in front of him and tentatively reached a head of fluffy bed-hair that he ruffled enthusiastically.

-Uh, hyung, please stop, my hair is as tangled as it is.- The voice didn't sound annoyed, just a bit meek.

-Mmmmm, go on you whiny baby, I'm coming in a second.- There was drool on his pillow.

Silence followed Yujin's light steps.

Yujin was a quiet person by nature, more than mingle, he observed from the outside what happened on the inside. He still caught-on to some things. Like how Sehwan did his best to impose some kind of order in their messy lives and how Jeong seemed more and more nervous every day.

-Make sure to be ready by eight-thirty, we have to be at the agency by nine, my darlings.- Sehwan was one over affectionate hyung. At first, he thought that the emotional care he put in them was the typical initial coddling Yujin received from every new teacher, but the more he learned the more he understood the tall man's actions. A family through and through. He liked children, and he liked Yujin and Jeong too.  
He showed that care mostly through cooking breakfast for them in a pink frilly apron (a 'gag gift' from Seongyeol that really didn't count as a gag gift if he knew that the oldest would like it.).

For now he had to comb his hair and try to look presentable in front of his bosses even if he knew that it was an useless attempt. He stared at his sweaty and pimply reflection in the mirror when a delicate hand, seemingly appearing out of nowhere, threaded carefully through his locks. He hoped that they weren't too oily.

-Coo-coo,- Jeong's minty breath tickled his ear.

Yujin yelped in surprise at the intrusion and took a deep, calming breath.- Hyung, please don't do that, you scared me.

-Sorry, I saw this,- The eldest tugged gently at the brown hairs, making Yujin shiver from the relaxing touch.- And I had to help.

-Now? There's no time.- He mustered interaction with people like Jeong made him very nervous.

-Tut, tut, tut,- His band mate clicked his tongue as he pointed towards the sink with his bandaged hand- an accident, he'd been told.- Wet your hair under the sink real quick.

-What? No,- He stared as the dancer reached the only cupboard in the whole bathroom, right under the sink to take out Sehwan's hideously pink blow dryer. Jeong was wearing a blue shirt.

-Do it or there really won't be any time left.

Without much more protests, he complied to the older's demands and quickly wet his hair with cold water. Jeong plugged the blow-dryer and toweled the younger's head. He stepped behind him to dry his hair as Yujin watched through the mirror, the older was taller and broader than him by a few inches, so he towered slightly above him, just enough so he could see Yujin in the mirror clearly. The elder was warm against his back as he used a comb to straighten his locks.

-All done,- Jeong passed his fingers one more time through his hair.- It's a bit wet, but it'll dry on the way to the meeting.

-Thanks hyung,- Yujin mumbled, genuinely relieved at his decent appearance.

-You're welcome Jinnie-yah.- Jeong's various bracelets clinked melodiously against each other as he waved a playful goodbye. Now it was time to get dressed and try to wake up Seongyeol again.

Gripping the performance reports in his hand, Sehwan listened Minseo's yapping. She went on and on and on. Her lips moved up and down, sideways and upwards, showing her teeth off.

Her lips were pretty, nothing extraordinary though, just rosy red from the expensive lip tint she had bought in a last attempt to make them bigger, but even then they looked dull on her. Her entire personality made them look dull.

-Sehwan-ah, did you hear about Eunhee's divorce? What am I saying, of course you have!- She laughed obnoxiously loud. Sehwan did not, in fact, know about it, but it wasn't as strange any more to let people think he knew way more than he did way before than they did.- A messy affair, don't you think? She had it backwards, poor girl,- She stifled her nasal laugh with her hand.- How do you marry someone you don't know? At nineteen? Seriously!

He looked around in case someone was listening in (everyone wanted to listen in on his conversations).You answer once 'yes I knew about Seyong from marketing's fight with Sunmi from legal, oh please I have my sources.' and everyone thought you were a spy in a past life. The aforementioned situation had happened mere hours ago but the gossip mill ran fast in the boring-ass company and he was tired from a six-hour dance practice with two more classes to go to. He didn't give a heck in that moment, but boy did he come to regret it. Somehow, everyone though that he had the best gossip and gave him the best gossip in turn.

Sehwan just wanted the papers that Hwang left (irresponsible, their manager was irresponsible) and start the meeting.

-Listen love,- He used the term loosely, but it made all of the female employees swoon so who's he to stop?- I didn't pay much attention, yesterday's news.- He waved his hand in dismissal with a playful roll of his eyes, it probably happened this morning.

Minseo watched the gesture hungrily, desperate for the information, she knew that Sehwan was well aware of what she looked for.

Desperate to escape, he threw a metaphorical bone at the harpy. That was the whole point of the interaction, she wanted to know something, so she started a conversation with Sehwan away from prying eyes. The starter was a little something to break the ice, small talk that was unknowingly helping him instead of her. Then she would offer something first, a stray bit of cooler talk or something Minseo had heard while waiting for the copy machine. Something that she thought that he would consider fair exchange. It was ridiculous.

He never accepted, but they always offered. That done, Sehwan had to give something in turn, even if he hadn't taken anything in the first place. So to speak.

He took a subtle step forward to get closer and give a sense of privacy and importance, and as if on cue she scurried towards him.

-Jihan-hyung did invite Mija-ah to a date, but- Minseo stared intensely at him, it was slightly unnerving.- She refused.

Loud gasp.

-What? She's leading him on, they were flirting all week!

-I don't know about that noona, but he isn't giving up. I heard that he'll try again today, it may be a second opportunity for you.- He shushed at her with a wink.- But you didn't hear that from me.

Minseo gaped slightly, then thanked him with an inappropriate level of respect.

Now came in the real reason why he was doing this entire tomfoolery.

-So, noona, our deal?- Minseo straightened from her ninety degree bow. Nodding enthusiastically, she went back to Hwan's office to organize the man's paperwork. If she didn't do it no one would as Manager Hwang was incompetent and aimless.

Sehwan wasn't biased, he swears. He wasn't one to hold grudges... He swears.

Yujin did his best to pay attention to the boring reports. Mostly obvious things, like height and monthly performance.

Seongyeol with his 1'60m ("5'3) and 52'2kg (115'2 lbs) was still underweight but progressing at a healthy rate and thus didn't need any adjustments to his diet. Sehwan scowled as if the monthly report had offended him personally, but Yujin saw how Seongyeol casually reached across the meeting table to squeeze the Leader's hand.

Yujin himself with his 1'49m ("4'8) and 41 kg (90'3lbs) in optimal BMI range for his age was under no discussion for dietary plans as per contract and Sehwan's strict prohibition.

Jeong (as expected) was perfect. His 1'65m ("5'4), and growing, were further thinned out by his 57 kg (126lbs).

Sehwan didn't really need to be weighed, the eldest was built like an ox and had the height to back it up (1'84m/"6). Diet was also not recommended, mostly because Sehwan loved food and would fight anyone for a stepped-on chicken nugget from the McDonald down the street.

He yawned behind his hand, just like his mom had taught him.

-Now,- Mr.CEO set the report sheets on the table. His plain looking PA picked them up and stowed away the tree waste in a discrete binder.- Onto the real (Hwang scowled) reason of the meeting.

Mr.CEO made a slight pause, probably recollecting his thoughts and looking at other information. Yujin swung his feet in impatience, Mr.CEO might be a fun grandpa to be around but he was still a grandpa, with taxes to pay and such. The elderly man spoke.

-We have decided, together with the New Media department (NM) to promote the group via social media.- He announced with a proud twinkle in his eyes.

-Yes!- Jeong whisper shouted beside him.- Fuck yes!

-Like a Twitter or something?- Asked Seongyeol, unenthusiastic to the whole idea. He was a private person and Yujin could respect that.

-Yes, as a start, as well as a YouTube channel. Then an Instagram account, when you gain popularity, just before the group's debut as a teaser to your future audience.- Rushed to explain the head of the NM department, a short, pudgy man in his mid-thirties. He probably found Seongyeol intimidating despite just hearing his weight that compared to two (2) wet cats. Yujin wouldn't lie by saying that the teen's gaze was scorching when annoyed.

The atmosphere in the room changed immediately, the word 'debut' was like a trigger. It promised. Yujin saw Seongyeol swallow, previous disinterest forgotten, but it was Sehwan who spoke first.

-Mr.CEO,- He cleared his throat just to give himself more time.- Is- Is there a possibility... of a debut? Or like-like an approximate date?

-Yeah, yeah, yeah, ask him, ask him.- Jeong nodded his approval at the question with a fervent whisper.

Seongyeol leaned forward in interest.

-We didn't plan to announce it right away- The CEO chuckled ruefully. The head of the NM department looked nervous for some reason.- But yes, your performance is exceeding our expectations... I'd consider you ready for the big scene in, say, over a year.

Sehwan gasped dramatically, clapping loudly his hand over his gaping mouth. Seongyeol nodded as cool as a cucumber as if he wasn't panicking on the inside.

-Oh... My god.- Said Jeong giggly from the news.

Things wrapped up pretty quickly after that, they had English lessons in half-an-hour so they had to be punctual or Mrs. Bang would kill them.

-Oh! And before you leave, please take your time to read these. We'll comment on the changes needed in our next meeting!

Yujin didn't know how to feel. He's been part of GC for two weeks, Jeong and Sehwan for one year and Seongyeol for two. It was a short time, he felt, the difference was big. The word debut probably meant much more to them. It was their dream to make music and he choose to take on the responsibility.  
Either way, his perception of time was a bit twisted, and he felt kind of numb, he's been feeling numb since he left his home to come to Seoul.

A thin-fingered hand tapped his shoulder.

-Jinnie, come on,- Prodded Jeong with a huge smile. Yujin looked around the meeting room which was almost empty. It's only occupants were him and Jeong, while the other two waited for them at the exit.

-I'm just saying, I could've done better, there's... obviously some room for improvement.

-And I'm saying that this is not your fucking fault.- Seethed Seongyeol through his clenched teeth.- You can't blame yourself for this, it's not your obligation to cook for us and it's not your obligation to hover over us- over me.

-But it is,- Sehwan looked on the verge of crying and Seongyeol felt like he could cry too, this wasn't his intention, he didn't want this at all. He was making Sehwan feel guilty. And for what? Something that neither of them could control.- I'm the leader, I have to take care of you. I want to take care of you, I love you.

Seongyeol hasn't cried in six long years but salty tears slid down his cheeks easily and he roughly wiped them away from his face. When he spoke his voice sounded thick to his ears.

-You- He blinked disbelievingly.- You...? I love you too hyung. But this goes both ways you know? You can't be the only one responsible here.- He bowed his head to hide the burning blush. This was fine. More than fine, he felt happy.- We have to talk later, I'm not leaving this go-

-Hyungs.- A gnome!

-Ah!- Yelled Sehwan.- You scared me...- The leader huffed while clutching his chest. The small moment was over.- Don't creep on us like that.

-Oh,- Jeong looked ashamed, Yujin who was literally dragged into the situation looked ashamed.- I'm sorry... I didn't mean to interrupt.- Jeong's gaze roamed over his red face.

On their way out, Seongyeol tried his best to hide his face from Hwasa who tried to catch his gaze desperately.

Dinner, for once, wasn't chicken. It was pork, and it smelled heavenly. Bought on their way home it was a special meal to celebrate the reveal to the public. His stomach rumbled loudly as he laughed faintly to try to mask the embarrassing noise. Seongyeol, however, didn't seem to be as excited as the rest of them.

-Hyung do you want water?- Yujin offered eagerly in worry.- Or something small to eat? It can settle your stomach, like an apple!.

Seongyeol mumbled something that could be vaguely interpreted as a 'no'. But he looked green around the gills, saying he was feeling nauseous the moment their hyung put the (expensive!) meat on the stove. Jeong was afraid that he was going to puke and his hunched position on the sofa wasn't helping.

He slightly shook his head at the maknae, hoping that the other would take the hint. Their youngest did and went to the kitchen for the promised cup of water whether the rapper wanted to or not.

It was Yujin's turn to set the table anyway, so it was Jeong who stayed to watch over the sick rapper. A wet towel over his forehead seemed to calm down the symptoms a bit even if he started to feel clammy under the touch when he put his hand on the hyung's forehead.

He got worse during dinner. Sehwan set the Kimchi Stew pot on the table with a proud flourish and a smile, god, he was going to sweat like a pig (ha) with the spiciness. His mouth was watering, and he was preparing his chopsticks to dig in. Sehwan was a good cook, and they all craved home-made food when they had spent weeks surviving on ramen.

A terrible hurling sound broke the pleasant chatter around the round table. Jeong looked up in alarm.

-Seongyeol!- Exclaimed Sehwan in worry. Seongyeol, hurled again, clutching his stomach in discomfort and hunching even further into himself. He hadn't even gotten up from the sofa, claiming that he felt tired.

Jeong could only stare startled. What could he do? Bring a bucket? Towels? Carry Seongyeol to the bathroom? Call an ambulance? He's never cared about a sick person before!

Sehwan being the strongest, lifted Seongyeol by the armpits and helped him leave the room. Some semblance of control was set in.

 

Their whole apartment smelled disgusting and Seongyeol didn't know why. He was sweating and his intestines were rumbling and rolling, the nausea at the bottom of his stomach didn't let up and every time he breathed in the foul odour his tummy threatened to spill his lunch out.

A big warm hand rubbed his back soothingly, Sehwan's presence gave him the courage to speak without the fear of vomiting all over the floor.

-Hyung,- He whimpered out. Sehwan's humm showed that he was listening.- I need to go to the bathroom, I'm-

Seongyeol's plea for help was interrupted by another violent retch that pushed burning acid up his esophagus and onto the floor. The force his body involuntarily put in throwing up made blood rush to his head. His vision faded long enough to black to send him into panic.

-Jeong clean this up,- Sehwan sounded calm and in control relieving some of Seongyeol's stress, but he couldn't hear Jeong's answer and that terrified him. He was carried to the bathroom. Sehwan seated him on the toilet where his butt felt cold against the toilet sea. Either way, it was better than standing up at the moment.

The bathroom smelled like shampoo and disinfectants that Jeong liked to use for cleaning, it was the sweetest fragrance that Seongyeol had ever smelt in his life. The synthetic odours of chemicals calmed down the violent nausea that kicked his guts. He took a deep breath as Sehwan kneeled in front of him.

-Seongyeol-ah are you all right?- Sehwan's composure was still present in his voice but as he opened his eyes, he could see the facade for what it was. The leader looked like a mess. Sweaty from the hot fumes in the kitchen with his hair dishevelled Sehwan couldn't stop wringing his hands in worry and helplessness. Seongyeol hated to make others worry, the eldest's subconscious 'humm' that only came out when he was nervous set his own nerves on edge.- Come on kitten, answer hyung, please.

He could only nod faintly at the leader's previous question, not quite fine but way too out of it to formulate a proper response, Sehwan would know either way by his late answer. Seongyeol found himself spacing out between moments, distracted by the discomfort. He listened to the shuffling outside the bathroom and the muffled conversation. Sehwan's rhythmic stroking of his thighs felt nice, leaving his skin warm.

-We need to go to the doctor.- Sehwan's voice broke no argument, and who was Seongyeol to disagree? Not that he had the strength either way, black spots danced in front of his vision, he wasn't feeling well at all. He blinked once against the harsh yellow light above him and choose to close his eyes once more for the sake of his consciousness.

Someone knocked on the door.

-Come in!

-Um, hyungs, can I help with anything?- If Seongyeol were in a lucid state of mind, he would hug the maknae. As for now, he took a calming breath as his stomach started to rebel once more at the faint whiffs of food coming through the small crack.

-Uh yes, find my phone please, honey.- Yujin scurried away thankfully closing the door once again. Seongyeol swallowed, praying for release.

Sehwan's hand, always hotter, but somehow cooler at that specific moment, cupped his forehead, another one did the same to the back of his neck. It felt like heaven and he allowed himself to relax in the secure hold. It reminded him of his mother. His stomach gave out a pitiful noise and his hand unconsciously lowered down to massage the skin above it.

-Oh, my... You're burning.- Seongyeol was too tired to nod, a minute twitch had to do.

-Just say something if you feel like throwing up, hyung will hold you.- Sehwan promised with a kind squeeze of his nape.

Yujin came inside again, probably carrying the oldest's phone with him.

-I brought water, hyung.- Said Jeong appearing out of nowhere.

-Hon, I don't know, his stomach isn't feeling well.

-Nonsense,- Haha, Jeongie sounded like an old grandpa.- Water should be the first go-to medicine.

-... You know what? You're absolutely right.- Something cold was pressed to his lips.- It's water Seongie-yah, take a sip.

Seongyeol did just that, feeling immediate relief as the water slid down his throat and soothed his irritated intestines.

I couldn't last.

A cramp so powerful that made him throw up again from the pain racked his body. The small amount of water that he'd drunk mere seconds ago splashed onto Sehwan's shirt, bute didn't appear to care about that particularly. Sehwan felt hot all over.

-Jeong, bring me a new shirt sweety.- He requested, his voice started to sound tight around the edges.- Hwang-nim? Yes, It's Sehwan, listen, we're taking Seongyeol-ah for a check up at the hospital, please inform Mr. Dong that he won't be able to make it to the studio tomorrow... Yes, it's quite urgent, it looks like his sto-

Dial tone.

-...

-...

-...What the actual fuck?- Jeong breathed.

Seongyeol wondered what was happening, but opening his eyes made him dizzy, so he hummed at the back of his throat just to reaffirm his own existence. Sehwan pet his head reassuringly brushing some stray, sweaty locks away.

-... I'll... actually text Minseo-noona to pass on the message... And to drive us to the hospital... What a man.

-...

-He sucks though.

-Yeah...

Seongyeol didn't remember much after that.

* * *

 

Peaches and cream was a really nice person, the small gesture made Jeong feel better even if just a little. He was feeling grateful towards the kind stranger who chose to share his fluffy ball of joy with him. He felt good for a moment.

Now for something scary and a bit risky.

Jeong set his phone down arriving at the conclusion that the doctors knew fuck all about what happened to Seongyeol. Blood tests appeared inconclusive at the moment and he hadn't gotten a wink of sleep in the three-and-a-half hours he's been here. Yujin slept like a baby, on the other hand. Looked like it too, pouting in your sleep should be illegal.

He set his phone down and gave a tired sigh of contemplation. He saw Sehwan stir out of the corner of his eye, the eldest had dropped on the waiting room's plastic seat like a sack of potatoes. Sleep came easily to the leader from then on, no matter how uncomfortable the chair looked. So he's been waiting alone for news since the moment Seongyeol disappeared behind the generic wooden door of his personal doctor's office. He felt tired and worried, incapable of imagining the worst-case scenarios but knowing that they existed and lurked, hiding from his imagination.

Jeong yawned tiredly, but worry couldn't let him sleep. Someone entered the hallway they were in, judging by the loud slaps of shoes against sterilized tiles. The double doors swung open and an unremarkable-looking nurse strode in, bypassing them completely. She knocked once at the doctor's office and entered quickly, closing the door firmly behind her.

He rubbed his stinging eyes with another yawn and decided to try his luck at a small nap. The two free seats next to Yujin looked downright entrancing.

Jeong was just about to nod off when the sound of the door opening startle him violently from his relaxed position. He looked up blearily as his thoughts were jumbled. The same nurse he'd seen enter, approached their little entourage.

-Um, mister Min's next of kin?

-Yes, but it sounds like he's dying, is he dying?

-No, sir, I apologise.- She fumbled with the clipboard in her hands.- There was only one person listed in his contacts, I didn't know which one was it.

-It's fine,- He jerked his thumb towards the nodding Sehwan.- That's Do Sehwan he's our hyung.

-Oh, I thought,- She tilted her head in confusion eyes jumping from his too-small t-shirt, to Yujin's slumbering face, covered by Sehwan's huge worn-out jacked, to the leader himself wearing the cheapest-looking clothes he had. She assumed something, he would let her think what she wanted. With a minute tilt of her head she plowed through the conversation- No matter, um sir, we would like to inform your brother that Mr. Min is ready to go home. Ah... Would you mind waking him up?

-Sure.- He gingerly got up, abandoning the hard cocoon of warmth he'd managed to create with his jacket. He shook Sehwan's shoulder once, and that was enough to wake up the tired eldest member.

-Uhn, good morning?- He mumbled sleepily.

-Sewhannie-hyung, Seongyeol-hyung is ready to go home, you need to talk with the doctor.

-Oh.- He sounded like he was still asleep. Stretching his arms above his head he blinked once at the nurse before bowing politely.- Good... night ma'am, thank you for caring for Seongie-ah.

He completed the greeting with a bow that the woman returned.

-Good night, good night,- She repeated back distractedly. - Sir, your brother is ready to be sent home would you like to help him?

Seongyeol wasn't a sickly person (except from getting scurvy that one time but he wasn't going to remember that one particular episode of his dumb life), so he was rather weirded out by waking up in a hospital bed completely alone. True, he liked the 'abandoned hospital at night' vibe but wasn't he having dinner with his band mates a little while ago?

A light flickered above the empty bed beside his, he shivered in delight.

-And I was saying to him- he wouldn't let me leave- I was telling him, 'I don't know why she told you that, why do you expect me to know these things? I don't know that woman, now please, I beg you, give me the cake back!'.- Sehwan laughed like a seal as he pushed the door open.

Jeong gave a fake-ass laugh, because Sehwan wasn't a funny person and that was okay... no-one wanted to hurt his feelings though.

(Yujin laughed, but that's because he was twelve.)

-Seongyeol-hyung.- Greeted Yujin sleepily as the other two continued to bicker. The kid waddled towards his bed and sat on the only chair besides it.

He pet his soft locks as the youngest nodded and yawned. A shy little person, but observant nonetheless. Seongyeol considered the maknae. He fit perfectly in the dynamics between the three of them, much to his surprise. He expected a month or two of awkwardness just like it happened with Jeong but that didn't happen. Quiet by nature, Min Yujin stole hearts left and right without remorse, even he could see it. Even he had a soft spot for Yujin.

Why was he thinking about this? He didn't know, but he felt loopy from passing out, so it was fine. Yujin's hair was really soft, though, he wasn't going to lie.

He couldn't be left with the feeling that they haven't broken the ice completely.

**Author's Note:**

> I actually realized this that at this current chapter the majority of the tags I put in the tin have no relevance to the story (at this moment! Please be patient ! ^_^) so I apologize to everyone who expected crazy fantasy adventures right away. But for those still interested, if you keep an eye open you's see some weird stuff happening. Enjoy!


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